The line graph below gives information about the number of visitors to three London museums between June and September 2013.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The line graph compares the number of people who visited three different museums in London over the period of four months in 2013.
It is clear that British Museum was the most popular place to visit from June to September. Science Museum attracted the lowest number of visitors each month.
In June, British Museum was the main cite visited by people, receiving 600 thousands. Natural History Museum and Science Museum attracted 550 and 400 thousands attendees respectively. Over the one month, although the number of visitors to British Museum saw an upward trend, booming to a peak of 750 thousands, the numbers of people who visited other two museums declined. The number of visitors to Natural History Museum dropped by approximately 170 thousands, while the Science Museum lost about 50 thousands of customers.
By the middle of September, both numbers of visitors to museums of British and Science fluctuated, whereas that of customers to Natural Historical Museum increased. British Museum lost 250 thousand customers in August, but received 150 thousands in September. Science and Natural History Museum attracted just under 490 thousand visitors each by September.
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flaws:
Don't need math in IELTS task I.
and you ignored July and August.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 10 10
No. of Words: 186 200
No. of Characters: 967 1000
No. of Different Words: 94 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.693 4.0
Average Word Length: 5.199 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.506 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 89 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 64 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 35 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 24 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.6 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.771 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.3 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.494 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.701 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.153 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 4