TPO 03 - Question 1

Speaking topics in text

TPO 03 - Question 1

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Votes
Average: 8 (2 votes)
This speaking topic by users
Post dates Users rates Contents
2017-04-08 Av9ash 70.00 Check this speaking
2018-04-02 avaava 83.00 Check this speaking
2018-04-17 micro0o0 60.00 Check this speaking
2018-09-19 farheen19 50.00 Check this speaking
2018-08-20 toeflbeginner 66.00 Check this speaking
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Comments

oh, my goodness)
Why was it scored this way? I hoped to get 28. The idea was to write a paragon of an answer to strive to.
What should I change, improve to get a higher score?
I hope with your help to get a needed score. After I learn what is wrong, I will be able to work with it.
Thank you.

There are other minor reasons to get only 24:

1. We heard 'in fact', 'in order to do so' which are extra. There are noting wrong with them, but potentially with bad credits.

2. There are duplicated content in the reasons two. again it is not serious, but we don't like it.

3. The last sentence is not clear for us.