The diagram below show the life cycle of a species of large fish called the salmon.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The flow chart demonstrates the lifespan of salmon.
Overall, the cyclical process has three stages, starting with the salmon eggs are laid in the upper river, and finishing with the adult salmons swim back to the same place. The whole process lasts about 10 years.
First of all, under the upper river which moves slowly, some salmon eggs are laid between the reeds and some small stones. It takes about 5-6 months to hatch these eggs. After the baby salmons called fry (3-8 cm) are hatched, they will swim to the fast flowing lower river and stay at there for nearly 4 years until they grow to ...
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- In the modern society, schools are no longer necessary as we could have so much information throughout the internet that children could study at home as well. To what extent do you agree or disagree? 68
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
flaws:
1. under the upper river which moves slowly, some salmon eggs are laid between the reeds and some small stones.
better:
the eggs are laid at the downside of reeds and around small stones where the flow here is in a slow moving.
2. It takes about 5-6 months to hatch these eggs. After the baby salmons called fry (3-8 cm) are hatched,
look: 'hatch' is repeated. better:
After 5-6 months, eggs hatch and grow up into fries which shape in the length of 3-8cm.
3. 'swim' is repeated 4 times:
the adult salmons swim back to the same place
they will swim to the fast flowing lower river
the smolts swim to open sea
the adult salmons swim back to the upper river
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 9 10
No. of Words: 166 200
No. of Characters: 722 1000
No. of Different Words: 95 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.589 4.0
Average Word Length: 4.349 4.6
Word Length SD: 1.745 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 34 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 17 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 6 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 3 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.444 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.068 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.222 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.411 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.662 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.076 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 4
Transition Words or Phrases used:
finally, first, if, so, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 4.0 7.0 57% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 1.0 1.00243902439 100% => OK
Conjunction : 4.0 6.8 59% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 3.0 3.15609756098 95% => OK
Pronoun: 6.0 5.60731707317 107% => OK
Preposition: 24.0 33.7804878049 71% => OK
Nominalization: 0.0 3.97073170732 0% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 749.0 965.302439024 78% => OK
No of words: 166.0 196.424390244 85% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.51204819277 4.92477711251 92% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.58944267634 3.73543355544 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 1.82895574349 2.65546596893 69% => OK
Unique words: 99.0 106.607317073 93% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.596385542169 0.547539520022 109% => OK
syllable_count: 206.1 283.868780488 73% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.2 1.45097560976 83% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 1.53170731707 131% => OK
Article: 6.0 4.33902439024 138% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 1.07073170732 93% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 0.482926829268 207% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 3.36585365854 119% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 9.0 8.94146341463 101% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 22.4926829268 80% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 51.9952514451 43.030603864 121% => OK
Chars per sentence: 83.2222222222 112.824112599 74% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.4444444444 22.9334400587 80% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.0 5.23603664747 76% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 3.83414634146 104% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 1.69756097561 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 0.0 3.70975609756 0% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 1.13902439024 88% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.09268292683 195% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0892967042037 0.215688989381 41% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0382584422452 0.103423049105 37% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0294058406649 0.0843802449381 35% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.058748474334 0.15604864568 38% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0206176136676 0.0819641961636 25% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.0 13.2329268293 68% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 87.05 61.2550243902 142% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.51609756098 48% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 5.6 10.3012195122 54% => Flesch kincaid grade is low.
coleman_liau_index: 8.88 11.4140731707 78% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.29 8.06136585366 90% => OK
difficult_words: 29.0 40.7170731707 71% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 11.4329268293 66% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.9970731707 84% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.0658536585 81% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 56.1797752809 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.