Some countries encourage teenagers to have part-time job and see it as a good thing, while others disagree. Give your opinion and explain both views.
Depend on the country, it is common for teenagers in some areas to seek out part time employment. That being said, there are differing views as to whether this is a positive trend or not. Personally, I agree with the former view, which support this idea of parting time work.
On the one hand, working in a part time job has abundance of advantages obviously. Firstly, juvenile could gain the experience before they have left school. For example, instead of using whole day for playing video game or watching crazy stuff they have a turn to participate in a team which could lead them to obtain more experience of social skills. Also, they learn how to take over themselves and solve obstacles in their job. Secondly, a lot of chances for teenagers to meet and make new friends easily while sometimes it is very difficult to happen in school. Simply because, at that time every people need to gather with others to deal with problems.
On the other hand, I believe that part time might be affected on their study which is a top priority. Focusing too much on occupation that sometimes would make them stress and under the pressure. They would envisage the job is everything and their study is just a second priority. In addition, depending on the job, it is sometimes is a waste of time. Teenagers choose a job that is not relevant to their future career or even their passion. They just want to get money immediately. Over a period, they realize this part time job could no help them anything while they need to enforce themselves to gain higher scores for beneficial CV.
In conclusion, while there are many pro's and also con's in each opinion. I still believe that if there is chance teenagers should consider to have a appropriate job to enhance their skills and to become more stronger.
Comments
please help me to check and
please help me to check and find a right score for it
I see some grammar errors,
I see some grammar errors, like:
Focusing too much on occupation that sometimes would make them stress and under the pressure.
it is sometimes is a waste of time.
...
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 77, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
...for teenagers in some areas to seek out part time employment. That being said, there are ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 142, Rule ID: WHETHER[6]
Message: Can you shorten this phrase to just 'whether', or rephrase the sentence to avoid "as to"?
Suggestion: whether
...t being said, there are differing views as to whether this is a positive trend or not. Person...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 31, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
...me work. On the one hand, working in a part time job has abundance of advantages obvious...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 35, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
...ems. On the other hand, I believe that part time might be affected on their study which ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 139, Rule ID: ADVERB_WORD_ORDER[10]
Message: The adverb 'sometimes' is usually put between 'would' and 'make'.
Suggestion: would sometimes make
...y. Focusing too much on occupation that sometimes would make them stress and under the pressure. The...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 516, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
...ately. Over a period, they realize this part time job could no help them anything while t...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 96, Rule ID: THERE_S_MANY[4]
Message: Did you mean 'there are chance teenagers'?
Suggestion: there are chance teenagers
...n each opinion. I still believe that if there is chance teenagers should consider to have a appropriate j...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 146, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...hance teenagers should consider to have a appropriate job to enhance their skills...
^
Line 4, column 202, Rule ID: MOST_COMPARATIVE[2]
Message: Use only 'stronger' (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
Suggestion: stronger
...b to enhance their skills and to become more stronger.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, firstly, if, second, secondly, so, still, while, as to, for example, in addition, in conclusion, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 13.1623246493 106% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 7.85571142285 115% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 10.4138276553 86% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 7.30460921844 123% => OK
Pronoun: 33.0 24.0651302605 137% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 45.0 41.998997996 107% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.3376753507 84% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1479.0 1615.20841683 92% => OK
No of words: 317.0 315.596192385 100% => OK
Chars per words: 4.66561514196 5.12529762239 91% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.21953715646 4.20363070211 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.45013561369 2.80592935109 87% => OK
Unique words: 180.0 176.041082164 102% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.567823343849 0.561755894193 101% => OK
syllable_count: 465.3 506.74238477 92% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.60771543086 93% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 5.43587174349 184% => OK
Article: 1.0 2.52805611222 40% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.10420841683 48% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.76152304609 147% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 16.0721442886 112% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 20.2975951904 84% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 35.2546293256 49.4020404114 71% => OK
Chars per sentence: 82.1666666667 106.682146367 77% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.6111111111 20.7667163134 85% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.05555555556 7.06120827912 100% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 9.0 5.01903807615 179% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.67935871743 115% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.9879759519 125% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 3.4128256513 88% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.202038383876 0.244688304435 83% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.064506727714 0.084324248473 76% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.043465510226 0.0667982634062 65% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.127196326062 0.151304729494 84% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.00671619490982 0.056905535591 12% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.4 13.0946893788 72% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 62.68 50.2224549098 125% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.44779559118 42% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 11.3001002004 77% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.51 12.4159519038 77% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.72 8.58950901804 90% => OK
difficult_words: 65.0 78.4519038076 83% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 9.78957915832 82% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.1190380762 87% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.7795591182 83% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 73.0337078652 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.