The diagrams below show the changes that have taken place at West Park Secondary School since its construction in 1950

Essay topics:

The diagrams below show the changes that have taken place at West Park Secondary School since its construction in 1950.

The maps display the modifications that have taken place at West Park Secondary School since its construction in 1950. In common, it can be seen that the school had undergone some significant changes throughout the period with the expansion of the building, as well as the addition of a sports field and car park.
To begin , 3 blocks of houses which was located in west of the school, were removed in 1980. And instead of them were built car park and science block. Farmland, which was located in south of the houses was developed into a sports field for children in 1980.
However, in 2010, the school's main building and the science block were still intact. But the car park was increased in size and whole area of the sports field was taken up by car park. Subsequently, the large area of the playground, which was situated in south of the school's main building, replaced by a sports field.
In brief, the area around West Park Secondary School has changed and optimised for schools' various needs , for 60 years. In addition to a new science block, a large car park has been constructed and extended. Hence , the spot for the sports field and playground reduced.

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IELTS Writing Task I - IELTS Academic

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 215, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... some significant changes throughout the period with the expansion of the buildin...
^^
Line 1, column 289, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'sports'' or 'sport's'?
Suggestion: sports'; sport's
... building, as well as the addition of a sports field and car park. To begin , 3 blo...
^^^^^^
Line 2, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...dition of a sports field and car park. To begin , 3 blocks of houses which was...
^^
Line 2, column 11, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...a sports field and car park. To begin , 3 blocks of houses which was located i...
^^
Line 2, column 25, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... and car park. To begin , 3 blocks of houses which was located in west of the ...
^^
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... a sports field for children in 1980. However, in 2010, the schools main build...
^^
Line 3, column 91, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...the science block were still intact. But the car park was increased in size and ...
^^
Line 3, column 96, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...cience block were still intact. But the car park was increased in size and whole...
^^
Line 3, column 247, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... large area of the playground, which was situated in south of the schools main ...
^^
Line 3, column 266, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...playground, which was situated in south of the schools main building, replaced ...
^^
Line 3, column 282, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...h was situated in south of the schools main building, replaced by a sports fiel...
^^
Line 4, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...building, replaced by a sports field. In brief, the area around West Park Seco...
^^
Line 4, column 67, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...d West Park Secondary School has changed and optimised for schools various needs ...
^^
Line 4, column 108, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
... and optimised for schools various needs , for 60 years. In addition to a new scie...
^^
Line 4, column 218, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...has been constructed and extended. Hence , the spot for the sports field and playg...
^^
Line 4, column 238, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'sports'' or 'sport's'?
Suggestion: sports'; sport's
... and extended. Hence , the spot for the sports field and playground reduced.
^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, hence, however, if, second, so, still, well, in addition, in brief, as well as

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 7.0 157% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 1.0 1.00243902439 100% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 6.8 132% => OK
Relative clauses : 5.0 3.15609756098 158% => OK
Pronoun: 5.0 5.60731707317 89% => OK
Preposition: 30.0 33.7804878049 89% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 3.97073170732 151% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 961.0 965.302439024 100% => OK
No of words: 205.0 196.424390244 104% => OK
Chars per words: 4.68780487805 4.92477711251 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.78388967377 3.73543355544 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.48288799652 2.65546596893 94% => OK
Unique words: 106.0 106.607317073 99% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.517073170732 0.547539520022 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 263.7 283.868780488 93% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.3 1.45097560976 90% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 1.53170731707 65% => OK
Article: 6.0 4.33902439024 138% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 1.07073170732 93% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 0.482926829268 414% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 5.0 3.36585365854 149% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 11.0 8.94146341463 123% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 22.4926829268 80% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 36.375225426 43.030603864 85% => OK
Chars per sentence: 87.3636363636 112.824112599 77% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.6363636364 22.9334400587 81% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.54545454545 5.23603664747 144% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 3.83414634146 104% => OK
Language errors: 16.0 1.69756097561 943% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 3.0 3.70975609756 81% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 1.13902439024 351% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.09268292683 98% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.278967983594 0.215688989381 129% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.119864126955 0.103423049105 116% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.171768316917 0.0843802449381 204% => The coherence between sentences is low.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.193744294182 0.15604864568 124% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.151488625672 0.0819641961636 185% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.0 13.2329268293 76% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 78.59 61.2550243902 128% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.51609756098 48% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 6.8 10.3012195122 66% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.92 11.4140731707 87% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 6.99 8.06136585366 87% => OK
difficult_words: 32.0 40.7170731707 79% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 11.4329268293 96% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.9970731707 84% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.0658536585 90% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 67.4157303371 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.