A recently issued twenty-year study on headaches suffered by the residents of Mentia investigated the possible therapeutic effect of consuming salicylates. Salicylates are members of the same chemical family as aspirin, a medicine used to treat headaches. Although many foods are naturally rich in salicylates, food-processing companies also add salicylates to foods as preservatives. The twenty-year study found a correlation between the rise in the commercial use of salicylates and a steady decline in the average number of headaches reported by study participants. At the time when the study concluded, food-processing companies had just discovered that salicylates can also be used as flavor additives for foods, and, as a result, many companies plan to do so. Based on these study results, some health experts predict that residents of Mentia will suffer even fewer headaches in the future.
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the prediction and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the prediction.
The author concludes by predicting that residents of Mentia will have less headaches in future. He comes to this conclusion based on the findings of a twenty year study research. The writer's assertion might be true, but following three questions must be answered to determine the persuasiveness of the argument.
First of all, is the research conducted in a scientific way? There is a possibility that very few people were participated in the research and these number of people cannot be indicative of all people in Mentia. For example, if only ten people were studied, then the result obtained cannot be a common characteristics of millions of people living there. Also, the research may not be conducted by consummate people and they may not have taken other acounts for cause of headache in the studied members. For instance, the headaches in the members may have been caused by depression which was gradually overcomed by reduction of tension. If any of these are true, then the argument does not hold water.
Secondly, does Salicylates have common characteristics of aspirin? There is a possibility that Salicylates does not have any influence on decreasing headaches. Even though these two chemicals belong to same family aspirin may have a healing nature and salicylates may be neutral to harmful virus. Further, Salicylates may have more pernicuous effect than that of aspirin. Aspirin may be benign in other charateristics and can be safely used to cure headache but Salicylates may be malevolent to other parts of body. If any of these scenarios have merit, then the conclusion of the argument is significantly weakened.
Finally, will Salicyates used food be common among people? Perhaps the food in which Salicylates are used by food industries as flavor additives might not be liked by the people and there will be very less consumption of such foods. The Salicylates added food may have some amount of foul smell and also cannot give the exact flavor for food and are less choosen by people. Moreover, there is a chance that Salicylates are coslty for the food manufacturers and these may be used in very less amount on food that will not have any impact on curing people headache. These flavor used may only be surfacial and will not be adequate enough for reducing headaches. If any of these cases are the real ones, then the credibility of the argument is considerably hindered.
Thus, in conclusion, the argument, as it stands now, is significantly flawed due to its reliance on unwarranted asssumptions. If the author is able to provide evidence to these three questions (perhaps based on systematic study approach), then the viability of the argument can fully be evaluated.
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 10 2
No. of Sentences: 23 15
No. of Words: 448 350
No. of Characters: 2202 1500
No. of Different Words: 198 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.601 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.915 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.818 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 153 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 108 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 88 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 60 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.478 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.996 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.783 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.309 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.309 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.121 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 1 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 71, Rule ID: FEWER_LESS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'fewer'? The noun headaches is countable.
Suggestion: fewer
...ting that residents of Mentia will have less headaches in future. He comes to this c...
^^^^
Line 1, column 86, Rule ID: IN_PAST[1]
Message: Did you mean: 'in the future'?
Suggestion: in the future
...ents of Mentia will have less headaches in future. He comes to this conclusion based on t...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 184, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'writers'' or 'writer's'?
Suggestion: writers'; writer's
...gs of a twenty year study research. The writers assertion might be true, but following ...
^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 41, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a scientific way" with adverb for "scientific"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...First of all, is the research conducted in a scientific way? There is a possibility that very few p...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 303, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[2]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'characteristic'?
Suggestion: characteristic
... the result obtained cannot be a common characteristics of millions of people living there. Als...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, if, may, moreover, second, secondly, so, then, thus, for example, for instance, in conclusion, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 33.0 19.6327345309 168% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 24.0 12.9520958084 185% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 11.1786427146 98% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 13.6137724551 59% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 19.0 28.8173652695 66% => OK
Preposition: 54.0 55.5748502994 97% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 16.3942115768 79% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2252.0 2260.96107784 100% => OK
No of words: 448.0 441.139720559 102% => OK
Chars per words: 5.02678571429 5.12650576532 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.60065326758 4.56307096286 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.88236288216 2.78398813304 104% => OK
Unique words: 205.0 204.123752495 100% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.457589285714 0.468620217663 98% => OK
syllable_count: 735.3 705.55239521 104% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 4.96107784431 40% => OK
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 2.70958083832 258% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 19.7664670659 116% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 22.8473053892 83% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 37.876777629 57.8364921388 65% => OK
Chars per sentence: 97.9130434783 119.503703932 82% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.4782608696 23.324526521 84% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.82608695652 5.70786347227 102% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.25449101796 95% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 8.20758483034 49% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 6.88822355289 116% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 11.0 4.67664670659 235% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.159527670458 0.218282227539 73% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0556567740788 0.0743258471296 75% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0502255414997 0.0701772020484 72% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0930118364392 0.128457276422 72% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0621757097981 0.0628817314937 99% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.0 14.3799401198 83% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 52.19 48.3550499002 108% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 12.197005988 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.89 12.5979740519 94% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.6 8.32208582834 103% => OK
difficult_words: 114.0 98.500998004 116% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 12.3882235529 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.1389221557 86% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.