The following appeared in a health magazine.
"The citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles. Their responses to a recent survey show that in their eating habits they conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they did ten years ago. Furthermore, there has been a fourfold increase in sales of food products containing kiran, a substance that a scientific study has shown reduces cholesterol. This trend is also evident in reduced sales of sulia, a food that few of the most healthy citizens regularly eat."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The author of the article here claims that the citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles. In order to bolster his claims author has put forward some of the evidences. One of them is that the eating habits of people conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they did ten years ago. The second one of them is there has been a fourfold increase in sales of food products containing kiran, a substance that reduces cholesterol. However, in the evidences provided by the author, there are several flaws, assumptions, illogical rationale he made to support the arguments. In order to strengthen the argument, he should go through several discussions below.
Firstly, is nutrition the only thing that contributes to healthful lifestyles? Along with nutrition things like physical exercise, cleaner surroundings play an imperative role in healthful lifestyles. It is possible that over time people may have adopted more nutritious food in their lifestyles but might have reduced the physical activity which keeps them healthy. For instance, let us take the case of a person who might be taking more nutritious food than he was taking ten years ago. Over time owing to the busy schedule of his work it may be possible for him to eat nutritious food but not doing some physical activity. This lack of physical activity may still lead to different health issues for this person in reference. Thus, the author needs to consider and provide data related to factors other than nutrition that contributes to healthful lifestyles before making any hasty conclusions.
Secondly, are the nutritional requirements for a person the same as they were ten years ago? The author here is assuming that the nutritional recommendations ten years ago are roughly comparable to recommendations now. It might be possible that over time the nutritional requirements of people have increased but the government recommendations were not updated accordingly. For instance, let us take where a person needed 1000 calories of energy per day ten years ago and many of the citizens of Forsythe intake was only 600 calories. Similarly at present let us assume that the nutritional requirement of a person per day increased to 1200 calories and the intake of Forsythe citizens is 650. Even though the current intake of citizens increased by 50 calories when compared to ten years ago and nutritional recommendations of the government, the author doesn't take into account the change in nutritional requirements over time. Thus author needs to provide more evidence to support the nutritional requirements changes.
Thirdly, the author didn't mention anything about the number of people that were included in the survey. It may be possible that the survey has taken only ten percent of the population into consideration and extrapolated the results to the entire Forsythe. Thus ambiguities about the survey numbers decrease the reliance on evidence, while the author could render strong evidence with better survey numbers.
In a final summary, the argument is weak and is unconvincing. Thus, the answers to the above question need to be answered in order to evaluate the author's argument. However, the report fails to answer these questions and as a result, the author's claim that the citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles is dubious and as of now, the authenticity of the argument falls flat.
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 7 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 7 2
No. of Sentences: 26 15
No. of Words: 553 350
No. of Characters: 2820 1500
No. of Different Words: 243 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.849 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.099 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.854 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 212 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 161 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 122 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 69 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.269 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.97 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.692 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.301 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.513 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.168 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 163, Rule ID: SOME_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'some'.
Suggestion: some
...lster his claims author has put forward some of the evidences. One of them is that the eati...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 536, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Similarly,
... Forsythe intake was only 600 calories. Similarly at present let us assume that the nutri...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 856, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...endations of the government, the author doesnt take into account the change in nutriti...
^^^^^^
Line 8, column 21, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: didn't
...rements changes. Thirdly, the author didnt mention anything about the number of pe...
^^^^^
Line 8, column 257, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...ted the results to the entire Forsythe. Thus ambiguities about the survey numbers de...
^^^^
Line 10, column 148, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...to be answered in order to evaluate the authors argument. However, the report fails to ...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
accordingly, but, first, firstly, however, if, may, second, secondly, similarly, so, still, then, third, thirdly, thus, while, for instance, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 23.0 19.6327345309 117% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 12.9520958084 77% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 11.1786427146 98% => OK
Relative clauses : 16.0 13.6137724551 118% => OK
Pronoun: 34.0 28.8173652695 118% => OK
Preposition: 74.0 55.5748502994 133% => OK
Nominalization: 23.0 16.3942115768 140% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2882.0 2260.96107784 127% => OK
No of words: 551.0 441.139720559 125% => OK
Chars per words: 5.23049001815 5.12650576532 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.84493438435 4.56307096286 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.91545645895 2.78398813304 105% => OK
Unique words: 253.0 204.123752495 124% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.459165154265 0.468620217663 98% => OK
syllable_count: 916.2 705.55239521 130% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 12.0 8.76447105788 137% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.22255489022 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 26.0 19.7664670659 132% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 22.8473053892 92% => OK
Sentence length SD: 41.5756421919 57.8364921388 72% => OK
Chars per sentence: 110.846153846 119.503703932 93% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.1923076923 23.324526521 91% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.84615384615 5.70786347227 102% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.25449101796 114% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.20758483034 122% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 11.0 4.67664670659 235% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.270430025708 0.218282227539 124% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.076705984151 0.0743258471296 103% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0822802174288 0.0701772020484 117% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.141014325476 0.128457276422 110% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0607641862214 0.0628817314937 97% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.8 14.3799401198 96% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 41.7 48.3550499002 86% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 12.197005988 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.05 12.5979740519 104% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.09 8.32208582834 97% => OK
difficult_words: 119.0 98.500998004 121% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 12.3882235529 93% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.1389221557 93% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.