The following appeared in a health magazine.
"The citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles. Their responses to a recent survey show that in their eating habits they conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they did ten years ago. Furthermore, there has been a fourfold increase in sales of food products containing kiran, a substance that a scientific study has shown reduces cholesterol. This trend is also evident in reduced sales of sulia, a food that few of the most healthy citizens regularly eat."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The health and lifestyle of people is inevitably one of the most important aspects of living. Governments, organizations and people must always strive towards making a better, healthier future. The given article makes a lot of generalized assumptions. The argument is lacking in sufficient evidence to support its conclusions. It is important to examine each argument in detail before reaching a final conclusion.
To begin with, the author indicates that the citizens' eating habits, which conform more closely to governmental recommendations, is a direct cause for their salubrious lifestyles. If this is to be taken as true, we need more information. First of all, the argument incites in readers doubts regarding the scope and validity of the survey. Is the survey taken across a diverse set of people? How many people have participated in it? The data answering the above questions will make things a bit more lucid. If the survey was only taken in a very specific group, then it cannot be trusted. It essentially weakens the argument. On the other hand, if the survey was indeed conducted with the entire population in mind, and all other variables are agreeable, then, perhaps, one could agree with the premise and the conclusion thereof.
Building up on the implication that the increase in the sales of the food product kiran is directly related to the more healthy lifestyle of the citizens of Forsythe, we can come up with the following questions. Is the scientific study proving that kiran reduces cholestrol legitimate? Also, are the sales of this product only restricted to Forsythe? How much of it is exported? If the study is proven to be legitimate, then the argument could be strengthened. If the product is being exported more, then it weakens the argument since the citizens of Forsythe are not the primary consumers of Kiran, which means that the increase in its sales cannot account for the increase in health of the citizens.
Moving on to the final assumption, the author has stated that reduction in sales of sulia has led to the increased wellbeing of the citizens of Forsythe. More evidence is needed to support the assumption that sulia is pernicious to the health of an individual. Just because less number of healthy people consume this item, does not mean it is noxious. Maybe it has no effect on overall health. If more evidence related to the effect of sulia on health of people comes into light, then the conclusion can be derived. Are there any other baleful items consumed by the people? Is the sales of sulia unrelated to the lifestyle of people? If the answer is yes for any of the above, it can seriously weaken the argument.
Thus, the argument is rife with holes and assumptions. It is important to find evidences based on the above mentioned points, which can strengthen or weaken the argument. Only after a careful analysis can we reach a proper conclusion.
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 31 15
No. of Words: 490 350
No. of Characters: 2351 1500
No. of Different Words: 227 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.705 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.798 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.656 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 174 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 125 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 89 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 56 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 15.806 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.844 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.355 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.25 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.429 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.068 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, if, may, regarding, so, then, thus, well, first of all, to begin with, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 30.0 19.6327345309 153% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 12.9520958084 93% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 11.1786427146 63% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 13.6137724551 66% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 25.0 28.8173652695 87% => OK
Preposition: 73.0 55.5748502994 131% => OK
Nominalization: 18.0 16.3942115768 110% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2414.0 2260.96107784 107% => OK
No of words: 490.0 441.139720559 111% => OK
Chars per words: 4.92653061224 5.12650576532 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.70488508055 4.56307096286 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.7730661508 2.78398813304 100% => OK
Unique words: 237.0 204.123752495 116% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.483673469388 0.468620217663 103% => OK
syllable_count: 774.9 705.55239521 110% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Article: 8.0 8.76447105788 91% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 2.70958083832 258% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 31.0 19.7664670659 157% => OK
Sentence length: 15.0 22.8473053892 66% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 52.4329213214 57.8364921388 91% => OK
Chars per sentence: 77.8709677419 119.503703932 65% => OK
Words per sentence: 15.8064516129 23.324526521 68% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.25806451613 5.70786347227 57% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.25449101796 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 8.20758483034 146% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 6.88822355289 131% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.67664670659 214% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.159671570579 0.218282227539 73% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0368635049449 0.0743258471296 50% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0464487547335 0.0701772020484 66% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0777089895014 0.128457276422 60% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0516726254456 0.0628817314937 82% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.7 14.3799401198 67% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 56.25 48.3550499002 116% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 12.197005988 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.02 12.5979740519 87% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.31 8.32208582834 100% => OK
difficult_words: 122.0 98.500998004 124% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 12.3882235529 61% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.0 11.1389221557 72% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 11.9071856287 67% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.