“A jazz music club in Monroe would be a tremendously profitable enterprise. Currently, the nearest jazz club is 65 miles away; thus, our proposed club, the C Note, would have the local market all to itself. Plus, jazz is extremely popular in Monroe: over 100,000 people attended Monroe’s jazz festival last summer, several well-known jazz musicians live in Monroe, and the highest-rated radio program in Monroe is ‘Jazz Nightly,’ which airs every weeknight. Finally, a nationwide study indicates that the typical jazz fan spends close to $1,000 per year on jazz entertainment.
According to the part of the application above, the writer states that the jazz music club in Monroe will be a profitable enterprise. Since the nearest music club is currently 65 miles away, and typically jazz music fans spends close to $1000 every year for jazz entertainment purpose. Furthermore, over 100,000 people attended Monroe's jazz festival last summer. For this conclusion to hold true, the evidence should be properly evaluated and reasonable answers must be given to the three questions below.
Is distance more important for jazz music fans than the entertainment they get? Jazz music fans may be willing to compromise on distance for the sake of entertainment purposes. Fans are so keen on it that they can travel any distance for getting entertained. The newly established club must focus on providing quality service to overshadow other previously established music clubs even though they are quite far from Monroe. So, newly established music clubs must provide proper amusement to fans to capture the market in its hand.
Is it necessary that Jazz music fans always spend $1000 on Jazz entertainment every year? The money spent by jazz fans will depend upon various factors. If they find the music club tepid, they may not be willing to spend money that they previously used to spend. The music club should be vigorous enough to stir up its fan to be prodigal. So, the money spent by jazz fans is not always constant.
Does the charm of jazz music always remain? The fans of jazz music may shift to other genres of music if they monotonously listen to jazz music. As they grew up their demands and choice of attraction may differ in the future. So, it is not necessary that charm of Jazz music will always be on top.
The argument described by the part of the application, as it stands now, is flawed. The assumptions made by the writer have to be offset by the three questions above, for the argument to be logically corroborated.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2023-07-06 | ShirishBasnet1 | 60 | view |
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 3 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 335 350
No. of Characters: 1579 1500
No. of Different Words: 162 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.278 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.713 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.544 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 93 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 64 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 50 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 36 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.75 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 4.938 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.45 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.354 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.354 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.111 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 1 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 271, Rule ID: MASS_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error - use third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: 'clubs'.
Suggestion: clubs
...hey previously used to spend. The music club should be vigorous enough to stir up it...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
furthermore, if, may, so
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 19.6327345309 92% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 12.9520958084 100% => OK
Conjunction : 3.0 11.1786427146 27% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 5.0 13.6137724551 37% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 21.0 28.8173652695 73% => OK
Preposition: 46.0 55.5748502994 83% => OK
Nominalization: 14.0 16.3942115768 85% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1617.0 2260.96107784 72% => OK
No of words: 335.0 441.139720559 76% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.82686567164 5.12650576532 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.27820116611 4.56307096286 94% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.60435743639 2.78398813304 94% => OK
Unique words: 160.0 204.123752495 78% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.477611940299 0.468620217663 102% => OK
syllable_count: 492.3 705.55239521 70% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 4.96107784431 40% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 19.7664670659 101% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 22.8473053892 70% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 31.9998437496 57.8364921388 55% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 80.85 119.503703932 68% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.75 23.324526521 72% => OK
Discourse Markers: 1.2 5.70786347227 21% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.25449101796 19% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 8.20758483034 146% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 6.88822355289 44% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.67664670659 107% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.317918527148 0.218282227539 146% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.115864458449 0.0743258471296 156% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0835742064546 0.0701772020484 119% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.191333913567 0.128457276422 149% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.111049415767 0.0628817314937 177% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.7 14.3799401198 67% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 63.7 48.3550499002 132% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.4 12.197005988 69% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.44 12.5979740519 83% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.49 8.32208582834 90% => OK
difficult_words: 65.0 98.500998004 66% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 12.3882235529 69% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 11.1389221557 75% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.