In surveys Mason City residents rank water sports (swimming, boating and fishing) among their favorite recreational activities. The Mason River flowing through the city is rarely used for these pursuits, however, and the city park department devotes little of its budget to maintaining riverside recreational facilities. For years there have been complaints from residents about the quality of the river's water and the river's smell. In response, the state has recently announced plans to clean up Mason River. Use of the river for water sports is therefore sure to increase. The city government should for that reason devote more money in this year's budget to riverside recreational facilities.
The author's arguement avers that a cleaner river will corralate to an increase in water sports within the Mason River. This premise is used to bolster the recommendation that the city government should devote more money in this year's budget to riverside recreational facililities. While the arguement does not intimate at having a bad agenda, there are unwarranted assumptions that need to be considered.
To begin with, the author presents a slight contradiction by juxstaposing recreational facililities and recreational activities . The latter needs a trenchant explanation in order to lend itself as evidence to expand a budget. Are the preferred activities of the residents a priority based on use or do they simply like to watch these sports live, or on TV? If the residents only enjoy watching the water sports then a cleaner river would not result in an increase in use. Moreover, the author supposses that the facility should be a focus to the city without considering that residents might not parttake in sports regardless of it's cleanliness.
Additionally, the arguement assumes that the budget is not sufficient. It needs to be considered that perhaps the Mason River does not call for a big portion of the city's budget in order to maintain it's cleanliness. The arguement needs more evidence as to how the budget is currently lacking and how an increase would directly effect the cleanliness of the river. In fact, it could be that the smell does not corralate to the pollution of the river. Many waterbeds in our planet, such as rivers, lakes, and ponds, contain trace amounts of minerals that give of effluvium. No increase could ameliorate a natural scent that is embeded in the composition of that type of water.
Finally, the complaints that the city is receiving are not explicity tied to the Mason City residents who enjoy recreational activities. There needs to be more transperancy as to the connection of who is complaining and who would benefit directly from a cleaner river. It could be that the residents who are complaing do not even enjoy partaking in sports. Perhaps there is a stagnant participation by noncomplaining residents. Therefore, a cleaner river would not change the population who is enjoying the river.
To conclude, the argument above needs to consider it's assumption on residents and budget in order to request an policy change. While it does share data released from a survery, it is not enough to back up their arguement. We must first see a direct corralation to interested resident who enjoy partaking in water sports within the Mason river.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2020-01-29 | jason123 | 66 | view |
| 2020-01-26 | jason123 | 59 | view |
| 2020-01-20 | Ammu helen | 16 | view |
| 2020-01-17 | ramji90 | 82 | view |
| 2020-01-13 | shekhawat24 | 49 | view |
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Sentence: The author's arguement avers that a cleaner river will corralate to an increase in water sports within the Mason River.
Error: corralate Suggestion: correlate
Error: arguement Suggestion: argument
Sentence: This premise is used to bolster the recommendation that the city government should devote more money in this year's budget to riverside recreational facililities.
Error: facililities Suggestion: facilities
Sentence: While the arguement does not intimate at having a bad agenda, there are unwarranted assumptions that need to be considered.
Error: unwarranted Suggestion: No alternate word
Error: arguement Suggestion: argument
Sentence: To begin with, the author presents a slight contradiction by juxstaposing recreational facililities and recreational activities .
Error: facililities Suggestion: facilities
Error: juxstaposing Suggestion: juxtaposing
Sentence: The latter needs a trenchant explanation in order to lend itself as evidence to expand a budget.
Error: trenchant Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: Moreover, the author supposses that the facility should be a focus to the city without considering that residents might not parttake in sports regardless of it's cleanliness.
Error: parttake Suggestion: partake
Error: supposses Suggestion: supposes
Sentence: Additionally, the arguement assumes that the budget is not sufficient.
Error: arguement Suggestion: argument
Sentence: The arguement needs more evidence as to how the budget is currently lacking and how an increase would directly effect the cleanliness of the river.
Error: arguement Suggestion: argument
Sentence: In fact, it could be that the smell does not corralate to the pollution of the river.
Error: corralate Suggestion: correlate
Sentence: No increase could ameliorate a natural scent that is embeded in the composition of that type of water.
Error: embeded Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: Finally, the complaints that the city is receiving are not explicity tied to the Mason City residents who enjoy recreational activities.
Error: explicity Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: There needs to be more transperancy as to the connection of who is complaining and who would benefit directly from a cleaner river.
Error: transperancy Suggestion: transparency
Sentence: It could be that the residents who are complaing do not even enjoy partaking in sports.
Error: complaing Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: Perhaps there is a stagnant participation by noncomplaining residents.
Error: noncomplaining Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: While it does share data released from a survery, it is not enough to back up their arguement.
Error: survery Suggestion: survey
Error: arguement Suggestion: argument
Sentence: We must first see a direct corralation to interested resident who enjoy partaking in water sports within the Mason river.
Error: corralation Suggestion: correlation
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 17 2
No. of Sentences: 22 15
No. of Words: 429 350
No. of Characters: 2125 1500
No. of Different Words: 199 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.551 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.953 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.889 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 147 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 110 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 90 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 65 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.5 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 4.698 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.545 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.305 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.505 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.05 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 224, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
... government should devote more money in this years budget to riverside recreational ...
^^^^
Line 3, column 128, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...facililities and recreational activities . The latter needs a trenchant explanatio...
^^
Line 3, column 359, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...e to watch these sports live, or on TV? If the residents only enjoy watching the w...
^^
Line 5, column 328, Rule ID: AFFECT_EFFECT[7]
Message: Did you mean 'affect'?
Suggestion: affect
...king and how an increase would directly effect the cleanliness of the river. In fact, ...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 301, Rule ID: WHO_NOUN[1]
Message: A noun should not follow "who". Try changing to a verb or maybe to 'who is a are'.
Suggestion: who is a are
...r river. It could be that the residents who are complaing do not even enjoy partaking i...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 110, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'a' instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
Suggestion: a
...esidents and budget in order to request an policy change. While it does share data...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
finally, first, if, moreover, so, then, therefore, while, as to, in fact, such as, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 19.6327345309 97% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 12.9520958084 100% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 11.1786427146 63% => OK
Relative clauses : 19.0 13.6137724551 140% => OK
Pronoun: 29.0 28.8173652695 101% => OK
Preposition: 60.0 55.5748502994 108% => OK
Nominalization: 20.0 16.3942115768 122% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2171.0 2260.96107784 96% => OK
No of words: 429.0 441.139720559 97% => OK
Chars per words: 5.06060606061 5.12650576532 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.55107846309 4.56307096286 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.958999619 2.78398813304 106% => OK
Unique words: 202.0 204.123752495 99% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.470862470862 0.468620217663 100% => OK
syllable_count: 684.0 705.55239521 97% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 19.7664670659 111% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 22.8473053892 83% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 27.2075357208 57.8364921388 47% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 98.6818181818 119.503703932 83% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.5 23.324526521 84% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.36363636364 5.70786347227 76% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.25449101796 114% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 8.20758483034 146% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.67664670659 128% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.231548676261 0.218282227539 106% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0669740638513 0.0743258471296 90% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0738812621796 0.0701772020484 105% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.138367361111 0.128457276422 108% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.030096981854 0.0628817314937 48% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.2 14.3799401198 85% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 52.19 48.3550499002 108% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 12.197005988 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.07 12.5979740519 96% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.59 8.32208582834 103% => OK
difficult_words: 109.0 98.500998004 111% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.5 12.3882235529 101% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.1389221557 86% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.