Claim Even though young people often receive the advice to follow your dreams more emphasis should be placed on picking worthy goals Reason Many people s dreams are inherently selfish Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or

Essay topics:

Claim: Even though young people often receive the advice to “follow your dreams,” more emphasis should be placed on picking worthy goals.

Reason: Many people’s dreams are inherently selfish.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim AND the reason on which that claim is based.

The debate regarding the phrase "follow your dreams" has been running since long back. Many people know the feeling of succeeding in one's dream, and many others often oppose that the dreams are not worth sacrificing everything for. The prompt here suggests that young people should be thought to pick worthy goals instead of simply following what they dream of. I completely disagree with this because of the following three reasons.

Nothing is selfless in this world. There might be cases where we see people aiming for the wrong outcomes, perhaps that is what they having been dreaming of since a kid, but it might be the same with the people picking worthy goals. The outcomes of the desire behind the dreams should not be blamed on the way people mould their dreams. To illustrate the same, We often listen to or see various news regarding the people running the tech giants, or Multinational companies as many call them. All we know is that the people (CEO to be specific) behind the success of these tech giants, picked this as a worthy goal that they have fulfilled. But are we so sure that there is no selfish reason involved behind this? There are many things happening in the background that the common crowd isn't aware of. To reach a topmost position, it is often intended that certain decisions should be taken which might not be so appropriate in our conscience, but that doesn't mean that one must not follow his dreams. Not matter if we follow our dreams or pick worthy goals instead, the decisions taken will not always be pristine.

We might have come across various cases where people have picked up an __ instead of following what they actually want and regretting the same in the later stage of their life. Scientists have demonstrated that most per cent of humans achieve greater success when they follow their passion as compared to the ones who think practically and pick what they think will get them the success. For example, we often see people working in software companies are fed up after a certain point in their life. Many graduates aim for software jobs as it would give them the success they desire in a much easier way. But once they enter this field, they get stuck in a loop, which they do not know the exit for. In the end, this results in unhappiness, reduced results, abated personal growth which is not healthy.

One might argue that picking worthy goals are easier to achieve and will promise a stable, prosperous and desired future. But do you think, if we sacrifice our goals and work on something which does not define us or our motivation, it will take us to a better place in future? It is always a misconception of people that a particular path would give them the success they desire. And in the end, that is what stagnates our growth to achieve bigger. Therefore, we must always follow our dreams to achieve happiness and what we deserve.

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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 477, Rule ID: MANY_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun call seems to be countable; consider using: 'many calls'.
Suggestion: many calls
...h giants, or Multinational companies as many call them. All we know is that the people CE...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 784, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: isn't
...in the background that the common crowd isnt aware of. To reach a topmost position, ...
^^^^
Line 3, column 950, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...appropriate in our conscience, but that doesnt mean that one must not follow his dream...
^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, but, if, regarding, so, therefore, for example

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 23.0 19.5258426966 118% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 12.4196629213 129% => OK
Conjunction : 17.0 14.8657303371 114% => OK
Relative clauses : 22.0 11.3162921348 194% => OK
Pronoun: 67.0 33.0505617978 203% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 50.0 58.6224719101 85% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 12.9106741573 31% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2395.0 2235.4752809 107% => OK
No of words: 509.0 442.535393258 115% => OK
Chars per words: 4.70530451866 5.05705443957 93% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.74984508646 4.55969084622 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.35160174294 2.79657885939 84% => OK
Unique words: 238.0 215.323595506 111% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.467583497053 0.4932671777 95% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 711.0 704.065955056 101% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.59117977528 88% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 6.24550561798 176% => OK
Article: 4.0 4.99550561798 80% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.10617977528 32% => OK
Conjunction: 8.0 1.77640449438 450% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 3.0 4.38483146067 68% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 20.2370786517 119% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 23.0359550562 91% => OK
Sentence length SD: 44.1474604467 60.3974514979 73% => OK
Chars per sentence: 99.7916666667 118.986275619 84% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.2083333333 23.4991977007 90% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.33333333333 5.21951772744 45% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 7.80617977528 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 10.2758426966 136% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 5.13820224719 117% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.83258426966 83% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.282073993736 0.243740707755 116% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0834835056255 0.0831039109588 100% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.063789863298 0.0758088955206 84% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.190523594194 0.150359130593 127% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.084869682977 0.0667264976115 127% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.4 14.1392134831 81% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 67.08 48.8420337079 137% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.92365168539 39% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 12.1743820225 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.04 12.1639044944 83% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.31 8.38706741573 87% => OK
difficult_words: 85.0 100.480337079 85% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 11.8971910112 67% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.2143820225 93% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 11.7820224719 68% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.


Rates: 54.17 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.25 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.