Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
At universities and colleges, sports and social activities are just as important as classes and libraries and should receive equal financial support.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer
It is critically important that colleges spend sufficient fund on sports and social activities. In my perspective having decent collaboration with others, foster students' efficiency amelioration. I feel this way for two reasons, which I will elaborate in the following essay.
As mentioned earlier, if colleges provide adequate money for supporting social activities which include sports, students' efficiency will improve. Thus they experience much less negative feelings such as frustration. Whenever a pupil is feeling frustrated by spending a lot of time on an academic project and doesn't reach a satisfying result, he can reduce his negative feeling by going to the gym where he has interaction with others which in turn enhances his problem solving capability. In a recent nationwide survey, students were questioned whether universities should provide fund for collaborative activities as equal as academic affairs. Over ninety percent of the participants responded it is worthwhile for colleges to allocate adequate money to expand social activities because they can improve one's ability in thinking much better.
Furthermore, students who have social skills are more successful in their future jobs and there are more positions for them to be occupied. If universities provide satisfactory conditions for students to have adequate collaboration with each other, they have the opportunity to communicate with other students in order to improve their social skills. For instance, I know two brothers who have studied in the same field. However, one of them have studied in Sharif university which does not provide suitable conditions for students to experience social activities and the amount of budget allocated to enhance communicative skills is not comparable to the amount of money spent on academic affairs. The other one have studied in University of Tehran which allocates adequate budget to enhance students' social skills as equal as academic affairs. These two brothers had same GPA but the one who have studied in University of Tehran have sufficient collaborative capabilities but the other one felt intimidated whenever he wanted to introduce himself and was not able to express himself appropriately specially in job interviews. Thus the one with enough social skills is more successful than the other one without communicative skills.
In a nutshell, I strongly believe that it is substantial for universities and colleges to allocate sufficient budget to sports and collaborative activities as equivalent as academic progression. This is because it can improve students' efficiency and prepare them for their future occupation by increasing their social skills.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 163, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'students'' or 'student's'?
Suggestion: students'; student's
...ecent collaboration with others, foster students efficiency amelioration. I feel this wa...
^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 112, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... social activities which include sports, students efficiency will improve. Thus t...
^^
Line 2, column 147, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...rts, students efficiency will improve. Thus they experience much less negative feel...
^^^^
Line 2, column 309, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
... lot of time on an academic project and doesnt reach a satisfying result, he can reduc...
^^^^^^
Line 2, column 806, Rule ID: ONES[1]
Message: Did you mean 'one's'?
Suggestion: one's
...ial activities because they can improve ones ability in thinking much better. Furt...
^^^^
Line 3, column 1129, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...ropriately specially in job interviews. Thus the one with enough social skills is mo...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, furthermore, however, if, so, thus, while, for instance, i feel, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 15.1003584229 79% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 9.8082437276 61% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 13.8261648746 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.0286738351 100% => OK
Pronoun: 31.0 43.0788530466 72% => OK
Preposition: 48.0 52.1666666667 92% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 8.0752688172 136% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2277.0 1977.66487455 115% => OK
No of words: 409.0 407.700716846 100% => OK
Chars per words: 5.56723716381 4.8611393121 115% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.49708221141 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.061360982 2.67179642975 115% => OK
Unique words: 193.0 212.727598566 91% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.471882640587 0.524837075471 90% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 743.4 618.680645161 120% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.8 1.51630824373 119% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.59856630824 83% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 24.0 20.1344086022 119% => OK
Sentence length SD: 69.2215239442 48.9658058833 141% => OK
Chars per sentence: 133.941176471 100.406767564 133% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.0588235294 20.6045352989 117% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.52941176471 5.45110844103 83% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.5376344086 108% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 11.8709677419 84% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.131583577493 0.236089414692 56% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0533665264706 0.076458572812 70% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0410536242726 0.0737576698707 56% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0950914184977 0.150856017488 63% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0211903449051 0.0645574589148 33% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.8 11.7677419355 143% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 30.2 58.1214874552 52% => Flesch_reading_ease is low.
smog_index: 11.2 6.10430107527 183% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 15.0 10.1575268817 148% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 15.32 10.9000537634 141% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.73 8.01818996416 109% => OK
difficult_words: 101.0 86.8835125448 116% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 10.002688172 90% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 10.0537634409 115% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.