Claim: The best way to understand the character of a society is to examine the character of the men and women that the society chooses as its heroes or its role models.
Reason: Heroes and role models reveal a society's highest ideals.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim and the reason on which that claim is based.
The given issue concerns quite a difficult matter - a society. There is no doubt that any society is extremely complicated and intricate structure to reveal something solid and certain. In this regard, the proposed statement that best way to understand the character of a society is to examine the character of men and women that a society chooses as its role models and heroes is obviously controversial. Plus, the reason of the issue that it may help to reveal the highest ideals of a society is debatable at least.
Probably, no one would argue that a society is like a fusion of diverse people with different traditions, cultures and philosophies. Plus, the modern world makes the modern society more and more complicated, because the pace of today life is much faster than in previous epochs. A modern society bases on big cities and agglomirations. If to consider this structure, it will be easily found that the compound of such stuctures is not homogenous. For example, the New York city is the well-known city in the world, almost all people want to visit the city, or may be settle there. This tendition is quite understandable; however, it creates the great diversity of the New York society. It consists of different people: Dutch, Irish, Italian, Jewish and so on. There is no doubt that these people are distinct from each other quite seriously. Hence, it is quite tough to distinguish the common feature like the character of a society. For example, the role models that people choose could be opposite to each other. One group of people may choose Mahatma Gandhi as a role model, but another group of people may select Marilyn Manson as their hero. For instance, teenagers like to follow the rock stars. Hence, in this regard, the given issue obviously is not the best way to find out the character of a society.
The next thing that should be discussed is that role models and heroes, whom people choose, may reveal the highest ideals of a society. Perhaps, the statement is controversial and debatable. People like to praise someone or blame, however, they rarely follow their heroes. Probably, the smallest part of people who choose Gandhi as the role models follow his philosophy. While, the rest of people behave themselves according to their life experience and their own character. Hence, in this regard, the given reason is wrong.
To sum up, the issues states that the best way to find out the character of a society is to reveal the role models of a society, however, according to my argumentation, such statement is wrong.
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Sentence: A modern society bases on big cities and agglomirations.
Error: agglomirations Suggestion: agglomeration
Sentence: If to consider this structure, it will be easily found that the compound of such stuctures is not homogenous.
Error: stuctures Suggestion: structures
Error: homogenous Suggestion: homogeneous
Sentence: This tendition is quite understandable; however, it creates the great diversity of the New York society.
Error: tendition Suggestion: No alternate word
flaws:
Better not argue the reason and claim separately.
What we need to write is: How to understand the character of a society. and it give us an answer that it is from heroes or its role models.
then we can argue from TLPE:
T means Time: for example, heroes or its role models are not fixed and they change time to time.
L means Location: your paragraph 2.
P means People: people regard those heroes and heroines because they can realize people’s mutual dreams and goals which seem to be unattainable to people themselves.
E means Event: There are more approaches to understand the character of a society like from culture, customs and histories of the country....not only from heroes or its role models.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 24 15
No. of Words: 436 350
No. of Characters: 2050 1500
No. of Different Words: 194 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.57 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.702 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.512 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 152 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 92 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 58 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 45 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.167 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.856 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.708 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.303 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.423 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.058 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5