as well as making money, businesses also have social responsibilities. Do you agree or disagree?

Essay topics:

as well as making money, businesses also have social responsibilities. Do you agree or disagree?

Many people argue that besides making profits, businesses also have to take responsibilities for society. In my opinion, while the most vital purpose of business is money, I agree that they should also conduct that in a socially responsible manner.
On the one hand, the efforts of business trying to make maximise their profits would be beneficial to society. First of all, the more money companies make, the more taxes they have to pay. Therefore, the government can increase the amount of investment in building and developing many aspects such as hospitals, schools, charitable organizations. Secondly, businesses which make money can expand because they can set aside a larger amount of money from previous profits to invest again the companies. This can have a positive effect on employment by providing more jobs.
On the other hand, taking social responsibility also should be considered carefully when companies do their business. Due to the direct influence of business activities on the environment, businesses must not harm the environment. For example, emissions produced by factories which are the most common reason cause global warming and the pollution is more pressing because of the manufacturers' irresponsible disposal of waste. Moreover, businesses which make profits should put money back into the community through charity and financing scholarships. For instance, Unilever and Vinamilk have enhanced their brand images through programs donating their products and money for poor families.
In conclusion, although making profits is the fundamental principle of business, I believe that consideration of benefits society while doing business also should be another as important part as that.

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Average: 6.1 (1 vote)
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IELTS Writing Task II - IELTS Academic

Comments

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, first, moreover, second, secondly, so, therefore, while, for example, for instance, in conclusion, such as, first of all, in my opinion, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 7.0 13.1623246493 53% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 7.85571142285 127% => OK
Conjunction : 5.0 10.4138276553 48% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 9.0 7.30460921844 123% => OK
Pronoun: 16.0 24.0651302605 66% => OK
Preposition: 31.0 41.998997996 74% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 8.3376753507 108% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1456.0 1615.20841683 90% => OK
No of words: 262.0 315.596192385 83% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.5572519084 5.12529762239 108% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.02323427807 4.20363070211 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.94426006444 2.80592935109 105% => OK
Unique words: 159.0 176.041082164 90% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.606870229008 0.561755894193 108% => OK
syllable_count: 460.8 506.74238477 91% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.8 1.60771543086 112% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 5.43587174349 55% => OK
Article: 4.0 2.52805611222 158% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.10420841683 95% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.76152304609 84% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 13.0 16.0721442886 81% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 20.0 20.2975951904 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 37.8953713743 49.4020404114 77% => OK
Chars per sentence: 112.0 106.682146367 105% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.1538461538 20.7667163134 97% => OK
Discourse Markers: 13.0 7.06120827912 184% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.01903807615 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.67935871743 115% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.9879759519 75% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 3.4128256513 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.303816513911 0.244688304435 124% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.10612780357 0.084324248473 126% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0639909448912 0.0667982634062 96% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.193831354535 0.151304729494 128% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.057359841325 0.056905535591 101% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.8 13.0946893788 113% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 34.26 50.2224549098 68% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.5 11.3001002004 119% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.97 12.4159519038 121% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.45 8.58950901804 110% => OK
difficult_words: 80.0 78.4519038076 102% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 9.78957915832 87% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.1190380762 99% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.7795591182 83% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 61.797752809 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.