The role of education is to prepare children for the modern world. Schools should cut art and music out of the curriculum so that children can focus on useful subjects such as information technology. To what extend do you agree?
In recent times there has been much debate about which subjects should be included in the school curriculum. One particular issue is whether the introduction of more modern subjects such as IT for more traditional subjects such as art and music disadvantages the pupils. I believe that this is a difficult question and different solutions need to be found for primary and secondary schools.
There is one major argument in favor of replacing art, music, and sport on the curriculum with subjects like IT. This is that the purpose of school is to prepare children for their working life after school, so the subjects on the curriculum should be relevant to their potential careers. From this point of view, IT is much relevant to schoolchildren as they need to be computer literate if they want to survive in the workplace. For example, it is easy to see that word processing and programming skills will impress employers more than the ability to run fast or draw well.
There are also, however, strong arguments for retaining the more traditional subjects as part of the curriculum. One significant counter-argument is that the purpose of education is not just to prepare children for later careers, but also to develop their all-around “culture”. It is important that children leave school with some knowledge of art, music, and sport as all these are all helping develop aspects of young people’s personalities.
My own personal point of view is that there is merit in both sides of the debate and that all children should study some IT, art music and sport at least at primary school. At secondary school, however, children should be offered a choice between these subjects so that they can continue to study them if they wish.
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2021-09-29 | IELTS learner from VIETNAM | 61 | view |
2021-09-29 | IELTS learner from VIETNAM | 56 | view |
2021-04-20 | EgorEnglish | 78 | view |
2019-10-20 | Nishitaaaa | 78 | view |
2019-07-26 | Lê Thị Diệu Linh | 11 | view |
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 186, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[3]
Message: “So that” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...mount role and will be very ubiquitous. So that learning IT can help students prepare w...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
finally, first, firstly, second, secondly, so, then, well, for example, in conclusion, such as, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 6.0 13.1623246493 46% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 7.85571142285 102% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 10.4138276553 96% => OK
Relative clauses : 4.0 7.30460921844 55% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 20.0 24.0651302605 83% => OK
Preposition: 27.0 41.998997996 64% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 8.3376753507 48% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1064.0 1615.20841683 66% => OK
No of words: 211.0 315.596192385 67% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.04265402844 5.12529762239 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.81127787577 4.20363070211 91% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.67866862545 2.80592935109 95% => OK
Unique words: 141.0 176.041082164 80% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.668246445498 0.561755894193 119% => OK
syllable_count: 323.1 506.74238477 64% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.60771543086 93% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 5.43587174349 110% => OK
Article: 0.0 2.52805611222 0% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.10420841683 143% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.76152304609 105% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 12.0 16.0721442886 75% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 17.0 20.2975951904 84% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 36.153223308 49.4020404114 73% => OK
Chars per sentence: 88.6666666667 106.682146367 83% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.5833333333 20.7667163134 85% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.41666666667 7.06120827912 133% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.01903807615 20% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.67935871743 104% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.9879759519 50% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 3.4128256513 29% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.336458136138 0.244688304435 138% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.104408086882 0.084324248473 124% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0788073532079 0.0667982634062 118% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.179193659543 0.151304729494 118% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0610607070375 0.056905535591 107% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.1 13.0946893788 85% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 62.68 50.2224549098 125% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 11.3001002004 77% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.66 12.4159519038 94% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.75 8.58950901804 102% => OK
difficult_words: 57.0 78.4519038076 73% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 9.78957915832 92% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.1190380762 87% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.7795591182 83% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Minimum 250 words wanted.
Rates: 56.1797752809 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.