Some people believe that traveling to and living in numerous places increases one's ability to relate and connect to other people. Others believe that this ability is better cultivated by living in one place and developing a deep understanding of that community.
Write a response in which you discuss which view more closely aligns with your own position and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should address both of the views presented.
While every community is evolved in its own ways in terms of a variety of cultures, traditions, and ethical/moral values, one can only acquire a limited amount of understanding about a particular community. The world is a massive habitat of differently varying people and thus varying communities and cultures. I mostly agree with the prompt that emphasizes the fact that rather than being in one place and dwelling your experience on the same repetitive traditions, a person needs to move around more and explore numerous communities and plentiful ways of living from different people all around the world.
To begin, the world consists of 7 large continents with over 100 plus countries, which means, we share the planet with other millions and billions of humans. Statistically, there are more than 1000 different cultures let alone in the most multicultural country, i.e.; India, but also in other countries including the West. Can a person who has lived in the east all their life, be able to even closely fit in the Western culture? The answer to this question is no. Similarly, a person from the West, who has been taught the table etiquette of forks and knives, will not be able to understand the ethical concept of Indians consuming their food with bare hands.
Moreover, one’s ability to relate and connect to other people requires them to compare a variety of cultures to be able to find out where they’d actually fit in. A person cannot conclude what they relate to based on living only one scenario out of a thousand others. The best example of this would be the way women lived in the 80s. Every woman who grew up in the early 80s and late 70s didn’t have the fortune to learn about their fundamental rights as a sex that deserves equal opportunities compared to the male sex. This confinement led them to restrict themselves in household chores and not acknowledge themselves to be way more than that. Voting rights in the U.S. for women have been implemented after the British culture was completely evaded during independence. This proves the point that a person/community has to be enlightened with various other cultures without being confined to just one culture and interpret for themselves what they fit the most in.
Although there are marvelously deep concepts in some cultures and traditions of the world that one needs to spend more energy and time in order to understand the true meaning and reasonable analysis of a particular culture a community is centered around, it simply negates the fact that no matter how many years, how much of quantitively enormous energy you spend in, or how deeply you try to connect with a community’s culture, there is always something more out there, awaiting your discovery.
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2024-04-09 | guozhishan | 58 | view |
2023-10-06 | AmieeZhao | 66 | view |
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2023-08-03 | mana000 | 50 | view |
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 4, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...consuming their food with bare hands. Moreover, one’s ability to relate and co...
^^^^
Line 5, column 476, Rule ID: AFFORD_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the infinitive: 'to equal'
Suggestion: to equal
...ndamental rights as a sex that deserves equal opportunities compared to the male sex....
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, if, moreover, similarly, so, thus, well, while, as to
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 19.5258426966 92% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 12.4196629213 40% => OK
Conjunction : 17.0 14.8657303371 114% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.3162921348 106% => OK
Pronoun: 30.0 33.0505617978 91% => OK
Preposition: 73.0 58.6224719101 125% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 12.9106741573 31% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2296.0 2235.4752809 103% => OK
No of words: 463.0 442.535393258 105% => OK
Chars per words: 4.95896328294 5.05705443957 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.63868890866 4.55969084622 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.74473507262 2.79657885939 98% => OK
Unique words: 257.0 215.323595506 119% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.555075593952 0.4932671777 113% => OK
syllable_count: 722.7 704.065955056 103% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 6.24550561798 80% => OK
Article: 7.0 4.99550561798 140% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.10617977528 64% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.77640449438 169% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.38483146067 23% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 20.2370786517 79% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 28.0 23.0359550562 122% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 103.765793226 60.3974514979 172% => OK
Chars per sentence: 143.5 118.986275619 121% => OK
Words per sentence: 28.9375 23.4991977007 123% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.625 5.21951772744 89% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 7.80617977528 26% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 10.2758426966 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 5.13820224719 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.83258426966 62% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.192055870258 0.243740707755 79% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0616213446133 0.0831039109588 74% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0534534290373 0.0758088955206 71% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.104911415132 0.150359130593 70% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0425946513432 0.0667264976115 64% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.4 14.1392134831 116% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 43.06 48.8420337079 88% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 14.2 12.1743820225 117% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.08 12.1639044944 99% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.64 8.38706741573 103% => OK
difficult_words: 106.0 100.480337079 105% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 20.0 11.8971910112 168% => OK
gunning_fog: 13.2 11.2143820225 118% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.7820224719 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.