Hospital statistics regarding people who go to the emergency room after roller-skating accidents indicate the need for more protective equipment. Within that group of people, 75 percent of those who had accidents in streets or parking lots had not been wearing any protective clothing (helmets, knee pads, etc.) or any light-reflecting material (clip-on lights, glow-in-the-dark wrist pads, etc.). Clearly, the statistics indicate that by investing in high-quality protective gear and reflective equipment, roller skaters will greatly reduce their risk of being severely injured in an accident.
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.
The author has advocated a very important concern of skating without proper protective gear resulting in fatal accidents causing them to visit emergency rooms of hospital. However, the author argument lacks cogency and is rife with holes and assumptions.
Author has used hospital statistics to imply the need for protective equipment. But, the number of such cases are not highlighted in hospital statistics. If the number of such fatal cases are very low like 10 cases against a total total skaters of 1000+, then it implies that sufficient number of skaters wear protective equipment and the recommendation suggested by author is already being followed by many skaters making the recommendation futile.
Also, the statistics does not indicate the place of accidents and financial status of victims. If majority of the fatal accidents occur in rural areas where skaters are not able to afford protective equipment, the recommendation does not serve any useful purpose since they lack the financial means to get high quality protective gears. As an example, if 90% of the 75% accidents involve kids from poor neighbourhoods, then expecting them to afford expensive protective equipment is quixotic. Instead, they should be donated decent protective gear to help them keep away minor injuries. In view of these examples, the recommendation would have carried lot more meaning if these factors were also incorporated in the statistics.
The author failed to address the reason of accident. If the skaters were travelling at very high speeds beyond their control, then even wearing expensive protective equipment would have served no useful purpose. If this is true, then the skaters should be taught basic rules like speed limit which they lack in instead of handing expensive equipment. Moreover, if majority of accidents happened in areas where car owners drive at high speeds, skaters should be restricted in these areas instead of simply handing over protective gears to ensure less number of accidents take place. For instance, if majority accidents occur near highway where cars pass by at high speed, then the most viable solution is to prohibit skating near highway.
Safety is of utmost importance when performing any activity, especially those involving risk. Therefore, safety gears are necessity while performing any activity like skating to avoid injuries having detrimental consequences. However, the author failed to address other possibilities and concerns engendering from those possibilities. Argument presented by author is not persuasiveto enforce compulsory protective equipment while skating.
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 403 350
No. of Characters: 2167 1500
No. of Different Words: 209 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.48 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.377 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.77 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 169 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 130 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 88 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 65 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.211 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.314 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.737 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.314 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.552 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.117 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 225, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: total
...es are very low like 10 cases against a total total skaters of 1000+, then it implies that ...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 237, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[2]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'skater'?
Suggestion: skater
...low like 10 cases against a total total skaters of 1000+, then it implies that sufficie...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, however, if, moreover, so, then, therefore, while, for instance
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 19.6327345309 87% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 12.9520958084 46% => OK
Conjunction : 5.0 11.1786427146 45% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 6.0 13.6137724551 44% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 15.0 28.8173652695 52% => OK
Preposition: 56.0 55.5748502994 101% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 16.3942115768 98% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2217.0 2260.96107784 98% => OK
No of words: 403.0 441.139720559 91% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.50124069479 5.12650576532 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.48049772903 4.56307096286 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.85050431069 2.78398813304 102% => OK
Unique words: 216.0 204.123752495 106% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.535980148883 0.468620217663 114% => OK
syllable_count: 698.4 705.55239521 99% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 4.96107784431 20% => OK
Article: 8.0 8.76447105788 91% => OK
Subordination: 8.0 2.70958083832 295% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 19.7664670659 96% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 22.8473053892 92% => OK
Sentence length SD: 61.6187006186 57.8364921388 107% => OK
Chars per sentence: 116.684210526 119.503703932 98% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.2105263158 23.324526521 91% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.89473684211 5.70786347227 68% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.25449101796 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.20758483034 85% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 10.0 6.88822355289 145% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.67664670659 43% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.162323522921 0.218282227539 74% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.053251876718 0.0743258471296 72% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0440757379951 0.0701772020484 63% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.090020745367 0.128457276422 70% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0250648284198 0.0628817314937 40% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.1 14.3799401198 105% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 41.7 48.3550499002 86% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 12.197005988 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.62 12.5979740519 116% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.83 8.32208582834 106% => OK
difficult_words: 106.0 98.500998004 108% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 12.3882235529 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.1389221557 93% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 83.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.