Over the past year, our late-night news program has devoted increasingly more time to covering national news and less time to covering weather and local news. During the same time period, most of the complaints we received from viewers were concerned with the station's coverage of weather and local news. In addition, several local businesses that used to run advertisements during our late-night news program have just cancelled their advertising contracts with us. Therefore, in order to attract more viewers to our news programs and to avoid losing any further advertising revenues, we should expand the coverage of weather and local news on all our news programs.
The passage states that the television station should devote more time to weather and local news on their late-night news program. While it is not unreasonable to agree with the author's point of view regarding this issue, due to the brief reasoning he/she presents, more information is needed in order to make an decision that will actualy have a positive effect on the viewers and the advertisers.
First of all, it is important to analyze the author's claim that most of the complaints received over the past year were from viewers concerned with the station's coverage of the local news and the weather. But the author does not mention the validity of these complaints, compared to the number of viewers. If the television station reaches hundreds of thousands of people in a large city and it's vinicities, with a high index of audience during the night shows, and the number of complaints is no bigger that a couple of dozen, that would mean the news program is pleasing an amazing amount of viewers. If that were the case, a change in the focus of the news could be a mistake.
Following the afforementioned claim, ther is the fragile assumption that the viewers were satisfied with the news before the television station start devoting more time to the national news. If the number of complaints in the past was even bigger than it is now, and they dropped when the show started devoting more time to national news, that would mean that this change actualy had a positive impact on the viewers. The author would benefit from bringing information comparing the complaints before and after this change, in order to convince the readers that, when the local news and the weather started receiving less attention, more viewers started to be insafistied with the station. However, if that is not the case, this argument is completely invalid.
Moreover, the author assumes that the local businesses canceled their advertising revenues because of the station's changes on the late-night news programs. Even though this could easily be true, since that when a television station starts losing audience, the advertisers are likely to cancel contracts, ther may be other aspects that persuaded the businesses to make that decision. It is possible that they are investing less money in the television, and more money in internet and social medias advertising. With the technological advances, people are always devoting more of their free time to that, and watching less television. It is possible that the advertisiment in the station would decrease anyway, and the news program change did not affect this.
In other words, despite the fact that the author does highlight a possibility, more information is needed in order to make the satement's conclusion valid for more critic eyes and, therefore, to persuade even the most skeptic readers.
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Sentence: While it is not unreasonable to agree with the author's point of view regarding this issue, due to the brief reasoning he/she presents, more information is needed in order to make an decision that will actualy have a positive effect on the viewers and the advertisers.
Error: actualy Suggestion: actual
Sentence: Following the afforementioned claim, ther is the fragile assumption that the viewers were satisfied with the news before the television station start devoting more time to the national news.
Error: ther Suggestion: No alternate word
Error: afforementioned Suggestion: aforementioned
Sentence: If the number of complaints in the past was even bigger than it is now, and they dropped when the show started devoting more time to national news, that would mean that this change actualy had a positive impact on the viewers.
Error: actualy Suggestion: actual
Sentence: The author would benefit from bringing information comparing the complaints before and after this change, in order to convince the readers that, when the local news and the weather started receiving less attention, more viewers started to be insafistied with the station.
Error: insafistied Suggestion: insisted
Sentence: Even though this could easily be true, since that when a television station starts losing audience, the advertisers are likely to cancel contracts, ther may be other aspects that persuaded the businesses to make that decision.
Error: ther Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: It is possible that the advertisiment in the station would decrease anyway, and the news program change did not affect this.
Error: advertisiment Suggestion: advertisement
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argument 1 and argument 2 were talking about the same thing. don't need two arguments. one argument is enough.
argument 3 -- OK
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flaws:
Need to argue against the conclusion always. For this topic it is:
Therefore, in order to attract more viewers to our news programs and to avoid losing any further advertising revenues, we should expand the coverage of weather and local news on all our news programs.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 7 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 473 350
No. of Characters: 2321 1500
No. of Different Words: 202 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.664 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.907 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.573 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 166 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 127 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 84 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 50 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 29.562 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 12.067 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.688 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.373 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.579 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.096 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 311, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'a' instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
Suggestion: a
... information is needed in order to make an decision that will actualy have a posit...
^^
Line 2, column 153, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'stations'' or 'station's'?
Suggestion: stations'; station's
...ar were from viewers concerned with the stations coverage of the local news and the weat...
^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 561, Rule ID: PROGRESSIVE_VERBS[1]
Message: This verb is normally not used in the progressive form. Try a simple form instead.
...dozen, that would mean the news program is pleasing an amazing amount of viewers. If that w...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
anyway, but, first, however, if, may, moreover, regarding, so, therefore, while, first of all, in other words
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 23.0 19.6327345309 117% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 12.9520958084 69% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 11.1786427146 125% => OK
Relative clauses : 22.0 13.6137724551 162% => OK
Pronoun: 39.0 28.8173652695 135% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 63.0 55.5748502994 113% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 16.3942115768 98% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2368.0 2260.96107784 105% => OK
No of words: 472.0 441.139720559 107% => OK
Chars per words: 5.01694915254 5.12650576532 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.6610686524 4.56307096286 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.6401399552 2.78398813304 95% => OK
Unique words: 214.0 204.123752495 105% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.453389830508 0.468620217663 97% => OK
syllable_count: 727.2 705.55239521 103% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Article: 5.0 8.76447105788 57% => OK
Subordination: 8.0 2.70958083832 295% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 6.0 1.67365269461 358% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 7.0 4.22255489022 166% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 19.7664670659 81% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 29.0 22.8473053892 127% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 70.0999286733 57.8364921388 121% => OK
Chars per sentence: 148.0 119.503703932 124% => OK
Words per sentence: 29.5 23.324526521 126% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.8125 5.70786347227 119% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.67664670659 64% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.378661876157 0.218282227539 173% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.134691862963 0.0743258471296 181% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.119402773196 0.0701772020484 170% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.209717265855 0.128457276422 163% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.098142846419 0.0628817314937 156% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 17.0 14.3799401198 118% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 50.5 48.3550499002 104% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 12.197005988 110% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.43 12.5979740519 99% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.82 8.32208582834 106% => OK
difficult_words: 112.0 98.500998004 114% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 18.0 12.3882235529 145% => OK
gunning_fog: 13.6 11.1389221557 122% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.