Some people believe that the purpose of education is to free the mind and the spirit Others believe that formal education tends to restrain our minds and spirits rather than set them free Write a response in which you discuss which view more closely align

Essay topics:

Some people believe that the purpose of education is to free the mind and the spirit. Others believe that formal education tends to restrain our minds and spirits rather than set them free.
Write a response in which you discuss which view more closely aligns with your own position and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should address both of the views presented.

I am more inclined to the former view. While some types of formal education may restrain students’ minds, education, in general, still promotes rather than hinders the liberation of minds.

The purpose of education is the liberation of minds and spirits because education, regardless of its form, broadens the views of individuals, and broadens horizons, empowering the minds to think freely. When students receive education, no matter it is through an encyclopedia brought by their parents, or a class given by teachers at schools, they learn new things outside of the small space around them. By seeing things outside of their immediate environment, individuals are inspired to think out of their old mindsets thereby freeing their thoughts. For example, a girl living in a small village in rural China may have learned from her immediate environment that girls are only expected to be good wives and mothers, yet by reading the stories of Mother Teresa and other great women in history from school, she would realize that there’s more than one way of living for females. The girl, therefore, would learn to think outside of her gender stereotypes. Some may argue that there are forms of education that restrain rather than expose individuals to new knowledge, thereby constraining their thoughts. For example, some totalitarian governments may design education by deleting certain historical facts or even distorting some historical events to legitimize their reign of the countries. The individuals who receive this type of education may end up having a restricted mindset that blindly supports the propaganda of the government. However, this type of “education” betrays the essence of education, as education, by its definition, should introduce individuals to truths rather than lies, and should enlighten rather than blind individuals. Therefore, this type of false education should be more appropriately termed “brainwashing”, instead of education.

Some may argue even if education aims at enlightening individuals, it still tends to constrain individuals’ minds when it becomes formal. This argument holds true only in a limited scope of circumstances because this argument is reasonable only if it refers to a rigid type of formal education. The rigid type of education refers to the type of education with rigid forms of instructions and evaluations. In this form of education, students are regarded as passive receivers of instructions given by teachers and are not expected to raise questions. Correspondingly, this type of education evaluates students based on how much students absorb the ideas of teachers. This form of education is essentially a process of recitation and repetition and undoubtedly is not conducive to the independent thinking of students. However, there are various forms of formal education, and only a limited number of them are as rigid as is described above. School education nowadays is becoming increasingly encouraging to students’ innovative thinking. Many courses contain multiple chances of discussions, where students share their reflections on the course materials and teachers’ instructions. Some courses even take the form of flipped courses, which means students read the course material at home, and discuss them in class. In this way, the students not just passively receive the knowledge, but also actively take part in the construction of knowledge. This type of formal education undoubtedly enables students to think outside the box.

To sum up, since education entails the acquisition of knowledge, it inevitably leads to the liberalization of minds. While there are certain forms of education that constrain individuals’ thoughts, such types of education take an increasingly limited part of formal education, as formal education nowadays includes more and more discussions between students. Therefore, I believe formal education, in both its purpose and effect, liberates, rather than constrains the minds.

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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 971, Rule ID: MASS_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error - use third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: 'argues'.
Suggestion: argues
...ide of her gender stereotypes. Some may argue that there are forms of education that ...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 623, Rule ID: MUCH_COUNTABLE[1]
Message: Use 'many' with countable nouns.
Suggestion: many
...ucation evaluates students based on how much students absorb the ideas of teachers. ...
^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, however, if, may, so, still, therefore, while, as for, for example, in general, to sum up

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 19.5258426966 87% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 12.4196629213 89% => OK
Conjunction : 18.0 14.8657303371 121% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.3162921348 97% => OK
Pronoun: 40.0 33.0505617978 121% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 96.0 58.6224719101 164% => OK
Nominalization: 41.0 12.9106741573 318% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3384.0 2235.4752809 151% => OK
No of words: 611.0 442.535393258 138% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.53846153846 5.05705443957 110% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.97176167858 4.55969084622 109% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.10232834571 2.79657885939 111% => OK
Unique words: 285.0 215.323595506 132% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.466448445172 0.4932671777 95% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 1045.8 704.065955056 149% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59117977528 107% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 6.24550561798 192% => OK
Article: 6.0 4.99550561798 120% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.10617977528 193% => OK
Conjunction: 7.0 1.77640449438 394% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 9.0 4.38483146067 205% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 27.0 20.2370786517 133% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 23.0359550562 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 56.0458610957 60.3974514979 93% => OK
Chars per sentence: 125.333333333 118.986275619 105% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.6296296296 23.4991977007 96% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.7037037037 5.21951772744 71% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 7.80617977528 26% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 10.2758426966 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 5.13820224719 156% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.83258426966 186% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.239671525597 0.243740707755 98% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0685556822045 0.0831039109588 82% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0536629316678 0.0758088955206 71% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.16397282776 0.150359130593 109% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0299742799071 0.0667264976115 45% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.0 14.1392134831 113% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 40.69 48.8420337079 83% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.92365168539 141% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.1 12.1743820225 108% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 15.15 12.1639044944 125% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.47 8.38706741573 101% => OK
difficult_words: 145.0 100.480337079 144% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 11.8971910112 101% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.2143820225 96% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.7820224719 93% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.


Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.