The chart below shows the number of men and women in further education in Britain in three periods and whether they were studying full-time or part-time.

Essay topics:

The chart below shows the number of men and women in further education in Britain in three periods and whether they were studying full-time or part-time.

The charts compare the number of men and women in further education with they were studying full-time or part-time. It can be clearly seen that the amount of male did not correlated with the amount of female in part-time education.

In 1970/71 the amount of male followed part-time education is highest around 1000 thousands and the number of male chose full-time education only 100 thousands. At same year, it’s different of in the rate of female joined in part-time education is 750 thousands and full-time only 50 thousands. In 1980/81 occurred little different between in the rate of male and female in part-time education namely 850 and 800 thousands. And for full-time, in the number of male is 175 thousands and female is 200. The last year in 1990/91 happened increase significantly in the rate of female attended in part-time education is 1100 thousands inversely with male only 900 thousands. But, at the same time in the amount of male and female in full-time education is equal namely 250 thousands.

In my conclusion during three years, between in the rate of male and female pursued in part-time did not correlated, but in the full-time correlated we can see from the first to third year ensue rises amount of male and female dramatically.

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Comments

the amount of male did not correlated with the amount of female in part-time education.
the amount of male did not correlate with the amount of female in part-time education.

it’s different of in the rate of female joined in part-time education is 750 thousands
it’s different of in the rate of female joined in part-time education which is 750 thousands

In 1980/81 occurred little different
In 1980/81 it occurred little different

in the number of male is 175 thousands and female is 200
in the number of male it is 175 thousands and female is 200

between in the rate of male and female in part-time education namely 850 and 800 thousands.
Description: The tag a preposition is not usually followed by in
Suggestion: Refer to between and in

Sentence: In my conclusion during three years, between in the rate of male and female pursued in part-time did not correlated, but in the full-time correlated we can see from the first to third year ensue rises amount of male and female dramatically.
Description: The tag a preposition is not usually followed by in
Suggestion: Refer to between and in
Description: The tag an adjective is not usually followed by did
Suggestion: Refer to part-time and did
Description: A verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive is not usually followed by a verb, present tense, 3rd person singular
Suggestion: Refer to ensue and rises

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 8 2

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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.5 out of 9
Category: Poor Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 8 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 9 10
No. of Words: 215 200
No. of Characters: 1023 1000
No. of Different Words: 95 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.829 4.0
Average Word Length: 4.758 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.634 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 75 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 52 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 45 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 39 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.889 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.249 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.222 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.621 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.736 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.345 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 3 4