The availability of entertainment such as video games on handheld devices is harmful to individuals and to the society they live in. To what extent do you agree and disagree?
Technology has given rise to the abundance of means of entertainment, leading many people to believe that it is detrimental to both individuals and society. While acknowledging the reasons for this thinking, I would argue that this availability could be beneficial to an extent.
Granted, one might argue that as ways of entertainment proliferate, they could pose a grave threat to individuals and society. As for the former, prolonged exposure to technological gadgets might lead to several serious life-threatening medical conditions such as deteriorated eyesight, baggage, headache, or even depression, in a worst scenario. As for the latter, entertainment forms related to games, in fact, affects our brain subconsciously, potentially leading players to imitate the actions performed in these forms of entertainment. These actions may include robbery, mugging, violence, or even murder, perpetuating and exacerbating social issues. However, these mentioned above perspectives just happen if they are consumed excessively, and can be addressed effectively by restricting time limits, partaking in more outdoor activities, and engaging in personal interests. This, as a result, renders these means of entertainment a powerful tool for relaxation.
Dangerous as it might be, these forms of entertainment can exert such a favorable influence on people’s minds. Living in the 21st century, people are often filled with worry, ranging from family burden to school life. They, therefore, may find games or other forms of entertainment appealing and relaxing. Immersing themselves in such a mesmerizing world of entertainment can serve as a vehicle for relaxation, positively impacting people’s mental well-being. Aside from being a stress reliever, most, if not all, kinds of entertainment can bolster the economy. This is because companies and businesses can gain lucrative profit from offering and selling their services, collaborating with smartphones' brands to earn money for each download. These acts can significantly contribute to economic growth, making the society become more prosperous. This factor is a testament to how powerful these relaxing inventions can be in our lives.
In conclusion, while there are justifications for voicing people’s concerns about the harmful impacts of such means of entertainment, I would contend that if used appropriately, it will benefit both people and society.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2024-01-08 | tteruchan65 | 89 | view |
| 2023-07-12 | hieu13092006 | 84 | view |
| 2021-01-12 | nam.phanthanh97 | 89 | view |
| 2021-01-09 | Huy Do | 56 | view |
| 2020-04-26 | nghialeminh | 84 | view |
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 329, Rule ID: THE_SUPERLATIVE[1]
Message: Use 'the' with the superlative.
Suggestion: the
...ggage, headache, or even depression, in a worst scenario. As for the latter, ente...
^
Line 2, column 584, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...se actions may include robbery, mugging, violence, or even murder, perpetuating a...
^^
Line 2, column 909, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this means' or 'these means'?
Suggestion: this means; these means
...l interests. This, as a result, renders these means of entertainment a powerful tool for re...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, however, if, may, so, therefore, well, while, as for, in conclusion, in fact, such as, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 13.1623246493 91% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 17.0 7.85571142285 216% => Less auxiliary verb wanted.
Conjunction : 12.0 10.4138276553 115% => OK
Relative clauses : 4.0 7.30460921844 55% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 26.0 24.0651302605 108% => OK
Preposition: 42.0 41.998997996 100% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 8.3376753507 180% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2058.0 1615.20841683 127% => OK
No of words: 358.0 315.596192385 113% => OK
Chars per words: 5.74860335196 5.12529762239 112% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.34981470047 4.20363070211 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.34061396038 2.80592935109 119% => OK
Unique words: 221.0 176.041082164 126% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.617318435754 0.561755894193 110% => OK
syllable_count: 633.6 506.74238477 125% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.8 1.60771543086 112% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 5.43587174349 184% => OK
Article: 0.0 2.52805611222 0% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 2.10420841683 285% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 4.0 0.809619238477 494% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 4.76152304609 84% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 16.0721442886 106% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.2975951904 103% => OK
Sentence length SD: 47.7773816852 49.4020404114 97% => OK
Chars per sentence: 121.058823529 106.682146367 113% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.0588235294 20.7667163134 101% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.05882352941 7.06120827912 86% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.01903807615 60% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 8.67935871743 150% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.9879759519 100% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 3.4128256513 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.129811747444 0.244688304435 53% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0430178388411 0.084324248473 51% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0338277724098 0.0667982634062 51% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0737970773258 0.151304729494 49% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0169566084077 0.056905535591 30% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.2 13.0946893788 124% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 33.24 50.2224549098 66% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.44779559118 150% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.8 11.3001002004 122% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 16.07 12.4159519038 129% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 10.24 8.58950901804 119% => OK
difficult_words: 126.0 78.4519038076 161% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.0 9.78957915832 133% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.1190380762 103% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.7795591182 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 89.8876404494 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 8.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.