In developing countries, children in rural communities have less access to education. Some people believe that the problem can be solved by providing more schools and teachers, while others think that the problem can be solved by providing computers and I

Essay topics:

In developing countries, children in rural communities have less access to education. Some people believe that the problem can be solved by providing more schools and teachers, while others think that the problem can be solved by providing computers and Internet access.

Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

It cannot be denied that in recent years, in many low-income nations,
children that inhabit in some remote areas, have encountered illiteracy severely due
to the limitation of education access. While some argue that this complication can
be fully addressed by providing computers and Internet access, others believe that
constructing more schools and recruiting competent teachers will be a more
feasible measure. Personally, I claim that the second one is the best option to
apply. There are some reasons which will be discussed below.
On the one hand, dealing with the offence by spreading computer literacy in
inaccessible regions is advantageous somehow disadvantageous. Firstly, furnishing
computers and internet access can motivate students to get adequate education and
familiarize themselves with online education which is a state of art educational
mode. For instance, thanks to the advancement of internet, pupils from rural
communities can acquire a huge amount of knowledge from different resources
and studying via Internet also have the capacity to support children’s language
development as they can also study foreign languages by watching many videos
online and accessing to many useful websites. Therefore they do not have to go to
school due to geographic barriers which is highly convenient. In contrast, children
could be easily distracted and exposed to largely unregulated material in an unsafe
environment. Hence, providing technology to enhance education may be
counteractive.
On the other hand, it occurs to me that expanding the scope of school system
is vitally important. Because it is difficult to find a school in many remote areas
thus accessing to education is impossible. Hence, local authorities should invest
more in erecting school and recruiting teachers that illiteracy can be improved
because good teachers apparently inspire our students, promote their enthusiasm
and build their self-esteem to succeed in their educational goals. To illustrate, as an
impoverished country, Cambodia has successfully cut down the number of
illiterate children by equipping more schools and employing more teachers which
has lead to the improvement of educational system in their countryside.
To conclude, although offering technology bring a vast number of upsides
this propensity can be alleviated by erecting more schools and teachers.

Votes
Average: 8.4 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 16, column 47, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Therefore,
... and accessing to many useful websites. Therefore they do not have to go to school due t...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 22, column 23, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Because” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...of school system is vitally important. Because it is difficult to find a school in man...
^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, apparently, first, firstly, hence, if, may, second, so, therefore, thus, while, for instance, in contrast, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 13.1623246493 122% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 7.85571142285 153% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 10.4138276553 106% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 7.30460921844 151% => OK
Pronoun: 22.0 24.0651302605 91% => OK
Preposition: 49.0 41.998997996 117% => OK
Nominalization: 14.0 8.3376753507 168% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2070.0 1615.20841683 128% => OK
No of words: 357.0 315.596192385 113% => OK
Chars per words: 5.79831932773 5.12529762239 113% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.34677393335 4.20363070211 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.10019122809 2.80592935109 110% => OK
Unique words: 208.0 176.041082164 118% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.582633053221 0.561755894193 104% => OK
syllable_count: 646.2 506.74238477 128% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.8 1.60771543086 112% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 5.43587174349 74% => OK
Article: 0.0 2.52805611222 0% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.10420841683 238% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 0.809619238477 247% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 7.0 4.76152304609 147% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 16.0721442886 93% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 20.2975951904 113% => OK
Sentence length SD: 83.5805399999 49.4020404114 169% => OK
Chars per sentence: 138.0 106.682146367 129% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.8 20.7667163134 115% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.66666666667 7.06120827912 123% => OK
Paragraphs: 30.0 4.38176352705 685% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 2.0 5.01903807615 40% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.67935871743 92% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.9879759519 100% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 3.4128256513 88% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.312035739145 0.244688304435 128% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0962899693151 0.084324248473 114% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0774655317392 0.0667982634062 116% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0735483149409 0.151304729494 49% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0736186309399 0.056905535591 129% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 17.8 13.0946893788 136% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 31.21 50.2224549098 62% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.44779559118 150% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 14.6 11.3001002004 129% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 16.66 12.4159519038 134% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 10.44 8.58950901804 122% => OK
difficult_words: 128.0 78.4519038076 163% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 9.78957915832 123% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.1190380762 111% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.7795591182 111% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
Maximum five paragraphs wanted.

Rates: 84.2696629213 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 7.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.