Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Governments should spend more money in support of the arts than in support of athletics such as state-sponsored Olympic teams.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Budget planning is an important task for a government to allocate their money in a correct portion so that politicians can enhance the quality of life in various aspects of society. Some people believe that spending money on being a sponsor for athletics is more vital than using it in support of the arts. Personally speaking, I strongly disagree with this idea, and I am of the opinion that artisans need more money to put a fingerprint in societies' prospering. I feel this way for two crucial reasons, which I will explore in the following essay.
First, sponsoring art in various subjects helps a government to attract societies' attention toward arts, which mean provides more jobs opportunities for people. In this line of thought, in each country, jobs availability is an important issue for an individual, and their tendency to follow specific major or profession is depended on the job's salary. Hence, by sponsoring art in a community, people engross in different kinds of art genre, for example, painting, composing, and so on. It is obvious that people's passion for engaging in art forms provides enormous jobs for a region and improves the rate of employment.
Second, art describes in various forms, and each of them can change a person's perspective in regard to life, which improves their both mental and physical condition. To be more specific, promoting new and young artist who has a unique and special idea about life can stimulate major insights into people's point of view. For instance, take an artist who is supported by government funds to paint about the negative consequences of smoking in society, since this young artist has an influential notion to trigger people's intension to give up smoking. As a result, This work makes a person to think about himself and his loved ones and knows comprehensive information about his detrimental habit, for example continuing smoking in public places, so, he is shocked by the main purpose of paint and completely changes his attitude. Moreover, he follows a healthy diet and a lifestyle to not affected by a negative consequence of smoking. Had the government not sponsored an individual artist in the society, the quality and awareness of persons' lives would not have enhanced effectively among people.
To sum up, I firmly believe that patronizing art, thanks to the politician, helps society to guarantee its fortune. It is because arts' opportunities provide many different careers for people and because art changes the way people contemplate about their lives. It is highly recommended to carry out a survey to gain insight into which kinds of art needs more budget to be able to do effectively in a society.
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| 2023-07-21 | Take | 70 | view |
| 2023-05-20 | slliland | 90 | view |
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| 2023-02-12 | redark777 | 75 | view |
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- TPO 52 task 1 71
- Do you agree or disagree with the following statement Governments should spend more money in support of the arts than in support of athletics such as state sponsored Olympic teams Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer 85
- Do you agree or disagree with the following statement The rules that societies today expect young people to follow and obey are too strict Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer 76
- Do you agree or disagree with the following statement The ability to maintain friendships with a small number of people over a long period of time is more important for happiness than the ability to make many new friends easily Use specific reasons and ex 73
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 340, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'jobs'' or 'job's'?
Suggestion: jobs'; job's
... major or profession is depended on the jobs salary. Hence, by sponsoring art in a c...
^^^^
Line 3, column 72, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'persons'' or 'person's'?
Suggestion: persons'; person's
...us forms, and each of them can change a persons perspective in regard to life, which im...
^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 158, Rule ID: NUMEROUS_DIFFERENT[1]
Message: Use simply 'many'.
Suggestion: many
...t is because arts opportunities provide many different careers for people and because art chan...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 275, Rule ID: ADMIT_ENJOY_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the gerund form: 'recommended carrying'.
Suggestion: recommended carrying
...emplate about their lives. It is highly recommended to carry out a survey to gain insight into which...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, hence, if, moreover, second, so, for example, for instance, i feel, as a result, in regard to, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 15.1003584229 79% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 9.8082437276 61% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 13.8261648746 108% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.0286738351 100% => OK
Pronoun: 31.0 43.0788530466 72% => OK
Preposition: 69.0 52.1666666667 132% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 8.0752688172 149% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2238.0 1977.66487455 113% => OK
No of words: 446.0 407.700716846 109% => OK
Chars per words: 5.01793721973 4.8611393121 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.5955099915 4.48103885553 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.82326884846 2.67179642975 106% => OK
Unique words: 240.0 212.727598566 113% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.538116591928 0.524837075471 103% => OK
syllable_count: 705.6 618.680645161 114% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 9.59856630824 94% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.86738351254 214% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 26.0 20.1344086022 129% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 44.3089967978 48.9658058833 90% => OK
Chars per sentence: 131.647058824 100.406767564 131% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.2352941176 20.6045352989 127% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.52941176471 5.45110844103 120% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8709677419 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.162565349866 0.236089414692 69% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0568244099539 0.076458572812 74% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0631851535908 0.0737576698707 86% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.106887498552 0.150856017488 71% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0574103076521 0.0645574589148 89% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.3 11.7677419355 130% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 45.09 58.1214874552 78% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 10.1575268817 132% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.13 10.9000537634 111% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.28 8.01818996416 116% => OK
difficult_words: 123.0 86.8835125448 142% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 10.002688172 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 10.0537634409 123% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 10.247311828 127% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 85.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 25.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.