The following is part of a memorandum from the president of Humana University.
"Last year the number of students who enrolled in online degree programs offered by nearby Omni University increased by 50 percent. During the same year, Omni showed a significant decrease from prior years in expenditures for dormitory and classroom space, most likely because instruction in the online programs takes place via the Internet. In contrast, over the past three years, enrollment at Humana University has failed to grow, and the cost of maintaining buildings has increased along with our budget deficit. To address these problems, Humana University will begin immediately to create and actively promote online degree programs like those at Omni. We predict that instituting these online degree programs will help Humana both increase its total enrollment and solve its budget problems."
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the prediction and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the prediction.
The president of Humana University asserts that the university should promote online degree program to solve the stagnancy of the enrollment and the budget problem the university face. However, the president's assertion has several unsubstantiated assumptions and is therefore unpersuasive as it stands.
First of all, the president states that the online degree program has increased by 50 percent. Moreover, during that same year the expenditures for the dormitory and the classroom space had a significant decrease. Therefore, the president assumes that there are strong relationships between these two events. However, to verify this assumption, more information needs to be provided. There is a possibility that the decrease of the dormitory expenditure are the result of students not prefering the dormitory. Moreover, to make this relationship persuasive, there must be previous expenditures for the dormitory and the classroom space. The decrease might be a result of other on-going atmosphere.
Secondly, the president presents the past three years of enrollment result, and the increase of the cost of maintaining the building. To relate this statistic for the president's argument, there must be other information about it. The stagnancy of the enrollment might be a result of students not knowing the presence of the university. Moreover, there must be a relationship between enrolling on online programs and the decrease of maintaining the building. There might be other reasons for increasement of the expenditure of maintaining the building.
Finally, the president asserts that promoting online degree programs will increase enrollment and solve the budget deficits at Humana University. However, the president does not consider other possible result of promoting it. Perhaps, people currently enrolling in an off-line class might just move to enrolling an on-line class, resulting no increase in actual enrollment. Even worse, the cost of establishing online classes might outweigh the profits. Moreover, there are no explanation that the online degree program will solve the budget deficits at the university. There might be other reason for the universities current budget deficits. Furthermore, just because the last year's increase in online degree enrollment does not mean the increase will remain the following year.
In conclusion, the president's assertion that the university should instigate online degree program to increase enrollment and solve the buget problem of the university relies on weak substantiation. Therefore, the president fails to give logical explanation and reasoning.
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 9 2
No. of Sentences: 23 15
No. of Words: 389 350
No. of Characters: 2178 1500
No. of Different Words: 159 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.441 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.599 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.978 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 181 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 141 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 114 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 79 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.913 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.004 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.609 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.333 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.333 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.063 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 1 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 199, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'presidents'' or 'president's'?
Suggestion: presidents'; president's
...oblem the university face. However, the presidents assertion has several unsubstantiated a...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 677, Rule ID: ON-GOING[1]
Message: Did you mean 'ongoing'?
Suggestion: ongoing
...The decrease might be a result of other on-going atmosphere. Secondly, the president p...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 168, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'presidents'' or 'president's'?
Suggestion: presidents'; president's
...lding. To relate this statistic for the presidents argument, there must be other informati...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 20, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'presidents'' or 'president's'?
Suggestion: presidents'; president's
...the following year. In conclusion, the presidents assertion that the university should in...
^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
finally, first, furthermore, however, if, moreover, second, secondly, so, therefore, in conclusion, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 19.6327345309 66% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.9520958084 108% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 11.1786427146 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 13.6137724551 59% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 15.0 28.8173652695 52% => OK
Preposition: 43.0 55.5748502994 77% => OK
Nominalization: 18.0 16.3942115768 110% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2226.0 2260.96107784 98% => OK
No of words: 389.0 441.139720559 88% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.72236503856 5.12650576532 112% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.44106776838 4.56307096286 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.05704493819 2.78398813304 110% => OK
Unique words: 163.0 204.123752495 80% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.419023136247 0.468620217663 89% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 696.6 705.55239521 99% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.8 1.59920159681 113% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 0.0 4.96107784431 0% => OK
Article: 12.0 8.76447105788 137% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.70958083832 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.22255489022 118% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 19.7664670659 116% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 22.8473053892 70% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 34.3506327967 57.8364921388 59% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 96.7826086957 119.503703932 81% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.9130434783 23.324526521 73% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.86956521739 5.70786347227 85% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.20758483034 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.67664670659 192% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.296174169963 0.218282227539 136% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0904846313003 0.0743258471296 122% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0901791773819 0.0701772020484 129% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.184554059685 0.128457276422 144% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0467080406979 0.0628817314937 74% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.0 14.3799401198 97% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 38.31 48.3550499002 79% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 12.197005988 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 15.6 12.5979740519 124% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.16 8.32208582834 98% => OK
difficult_words: 92.0 98.500998004 93% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 12.3882235529 73% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 11.1389221557 75% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.