Twenty years ago, Dr. Field, a noted anthropologist, visited the island of Tertia and concluded from his observations that children in Tertia were reared by an entire village rather than by their own biological parents. However, my recent interviews with children living in the group of islands that includes Tertia show that these children spend much more time talking about their biological parents than about other adults in the village. This research of mine proves that Dr. Field's conclusion about Tertian village culture is invalid and thus that the observation-centered approach to studying cultures is invalid as well. The interview-centered method that my team of graduate students is currently using in Tertia will establish a much more accurate understanding of child-rearing traditions there and in other island cultures
dr. karp concludes that the interview –centered method that have used by his team in tertia will establish a much more accurate understanding of child-rearing traditions there and in other islands; however this conclusion cannot be accepted as it is because it rests on a number of premises all of which can be challenged in one way or another. Therefore, in order to fully evaluate the argument , we need to have a significant amount of additional evidence.
A problem with the argument is that the author assumes that things remain the same over the years. however in most cases this is not true. The results of dr. field’s study were achieved twenty years earlier than dr. karp’s results. one important thing that we should consider is that twenty years is a very long period of time which can cause many significant changes in the life style of people in the tertia island. For example maybe the biological parents figured out that their children would learn a lot of unacceptable behaviors and would do some immoral activities when they nurtured by entire village, thus they decided to rear their children by themselves. In this case, perhaps both studies of dr. karp and dr. Field have been corrected at the time they had been conducted and the method of study have not changed anything which means dr. karp’s conclusion that dr. field’s method of study is ineffective would be seriously weakened.
another piece of evidence that might help us to check this argument involves the exact locations where the study of dr. karp conducted. In the argument dr. karp claims that he have had interview with children living in a group of island not only tertia. it is possible that none of the children have not been from tertia island which means the study have taken place in another location in comparison with dr. field’s study. In this case we can conclude maybe children in tertia island are reared by entire village, while children in other islands are nurtured by their biological parents.
The last piece of evidence that we would need in order to fully evaluate this article is that although the methodology of both dr. karp and dr. field’s study has been determined, there is no hint about the sample size of the research. we do not know how many child have been involved in the study by dr . karp’s team. one possibility is that dr. karp have has interview with just 10 childs, while there have been about 2000 children in the tertia island. we cannot generalize the results to all of the children in the island.
In the final analysis, dr. karp’s conclusion cannot be taken to be correct because, as it was shown in the body paragraphs above, it lacks of enough evidence and depends on a number of evidence each of which is questionable. The conclusion can only be accepted if the weaknesses already referred to are all removed and also a number of strong evidence is added.
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
samples:
https://www.testbig.com/story/gre-argument-essay-topic-21-outline
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 13 15
No. of Words: 502 350
No. of Characters: 2332 1500
No. of Different Words: 214 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.733 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.645 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.458 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 157 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 114 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 78 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 38 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 38.615 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 21.392 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.538 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.395 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.628 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.203 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
dr. karp concludes that the interview –c...
^^^^^
Line 1, column 6, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Dr
dr. karp concludes that the interview –cen...
^^
Line 1, column 401, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
... in order to fully evaluate the argument , we need to have a significant amount of...
^^
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...icant amount of additional evidence. A problem with the argument is that the ...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 105, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: However
... things remain the same over the years. however in most cases this is not true. The res...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 105, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: however,
... things remain the same over the years. however in most cases this is not true. The res...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 248, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: One
...s earlier than dr. karp's results. one important thing that we should consider...
^^^
Line 3, column 328, Rule ID: PERIOD_OF_TIME[1]
Message: Use simply 'period'.
Suggestion: period
...der is that twenty years is a very long period of time which can cause many significant change...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...fective would be seriously weakened. another piece of evidence that might hel...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 6, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Another
...ve would be seriously weakened. another piece of evidence that might help us to...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 260, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...g in a group of island not only tertia. it is possible that none of the children h...
^^
Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...urtured by their biological parents. The last piece of evidence that we would...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 246, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: We
... about the sample size of the research. we do not know how many child have been in...
^^
Line 7, column 265, Rule ID: MANY_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun child seems to be countable; consider using: 'many children'.
Suggestion: many children
...ize of the research. we do not know how many child have been involved in the study by dr ....
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 313, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...ld have been involved in the study by dr . karp's team. one possibility is th...
^^
Line 7, column 316, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Karp&apos
...have been involved in the study by dr . karp's team. one possibility is that dr. kar...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 334, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: One
... in the study by dr . karp's team. one possibility is that dr. karp have has i...
^^^
Line 7, column 471, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: We
...out 2000 children in the tertia island. we cannot generalize the results to all of...
^^
Line 7, column 507, Rule ID: ALL_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'all the'.
Suggestion: all the
...nd. we cannot generalize the results to all of the children in the island. In the ...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...o all of the children in the island. In the final analysis, dr. karp's c...
^^^^^
Line 9, column 184, Rule ID: MANY_NN_U[5]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun evidence seems to be uncountable; consider using: 'much evidence', 'a good deal of evidence'.
Suggestion: much evidence; a good deal of evidence
...lacks of enough evidence and depends on a number of evidence each of which is questionable. The conc...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, however, if, may, so, therefore, thus, while, for example, in most cases
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 29.0 19.6327345309 148% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 12.9520958084 124% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 11.1786427146 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 21.0 13.6137724551 154% => OK
Pronoun: 41.0 28.8173652695 142% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 71.0 55.5748502994 128% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 16.3942115768 67% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2435.0 2260.96107784 108% => OK
No of words: 502.0 441.139720559 114% => OK
Chars per words: 4.85059760956 5.12650576532 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.7334296765 4.56307096286 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.64228433542 2.78398813304 95% => OK
Unique words: 227.0 204.123752495 111% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.45219123506 0.468620217663 96% => OK
syllable_count: 752.4 705.55239521 107% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 4.0 8.76447105788 46% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.22255489022 118% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 28.0 19.7664670659 142% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 22.8473053892 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 76.6737138688 57.8364921388 133% => OK
Chars per sentence: 86.9642857143 119.503703932 73% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.9285714286 23.324526521 77% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.78571428571 5.70786347227 49% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 21.0 5.25449101796 400% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 8.20758483034 49% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 6.88822355289 131% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 19.0 4.67664670659 406% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.234771308527 0.218282227539 108% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.06431048093 0.0743258471296 87% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0653485759637 0.0701772020484 93% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.138534763961 0.128457276422 108% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0912453687657 0.0628817314937 145% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.4 14.3799401198 72% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 62.68 48.3550499002 130% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 12.197005988 71% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.55 12.5979740519 84% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.25 8.32208582834 87% => OK
difficult_words: 88.0 98.500998004 89% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 12.3882235529 109% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 11.1389221557 79% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.