Salicylates are members of the same chemical family as aspirin, a medicine used to treat headaches. Although many foods are naturally rich in salicylates, for the past several decades, food-processing companies have also been adding salicylates to foods as preservatives. This rise in the commercial use of salicylates has been found to correlate with a steady decline in the average number of headaches reported by participants in our twenty-year study. Recently, food-processing companies have found that salicylates can also be used as flavor additives for foods. With this new use for salicylates, we can expect a continued steady decline in the number of headaches suffered by the average citizen of Mentia
The author concludes that the citizen of Mentia are now free from the number of headaches suffered by people because of salicylates in food. Sylicylates is the members of the chemical family as aspirin. It worked as an anodyne. It is actually a medicine to treat headaches. Even though many foods are already riched with salicylates, food-processing companies specially add salicylates in food for preservation purpose and it is also found that salicylates can also be used as flavor additives for food. However, these assumptions are plausible, they have no limpid evidence.
Firstly, the author assumes that decline in headaches are totally because of eating food made by these food processing comapnies which are used to add extra salicylates in food. This assumption holds no clear and rigid point. The citizen if Mentia might eating different food there is no proof is mentioned by the author that people always eat processing food, so the author can not assume that decline in headache are because of these processing food. It holds no good evidences to proof his statment.
In addition, the author assumes that rise in commercial use salicylates are because of consumption processing food by citizens. This assumption is irrelative and opaque, it lacks credibility to proof that increasing of commercial use because of eating more processed food. Increasing in consumption might be another reason also. The author should have mention more statistical data about increased commercial use.
Finally, the author assumes that studied which was founded is also improve to decline headaches because now it is proved that salicylates are flavor additives for food. The author assumed that it will be steady decline of headaches in citizen of Mentia but the author does not mention any evidence about declining in headaches and additives. He should have mention relation of both. The author should be more an aboveboard for his statment.
In conclusion, this argument depends on certain simplified assumptions about declining in headaches of citizen of Mentia the only because of salicylate added food and this food are consumed by all citizen of Mentia. The author could strengthen the argument by discussing other factos beyond decreasing headaches and it is only relate to chemical added food.
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Sentence: Firstly, the author assumes that decline in headaches are totally because of eating food made by these food processing comapnies which are used to add extra salicylates in food.
Error: comapnies Suggestion: companies
Sentence: It holds no good evidences to proof his statment.
Error: statment Suggestion: statement
Sentence: This assumption is irrelative and opaque, it lacks credibility to proof that increasing of commercial use because of eating more processed food.
Error: irrelative Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: The author should be more an aboveboard for his statment.
Error: statment Suggestion: statement
Sentence: The author could strengthen the argument by discussing other factos beyond decreasing headaches and it is only relate to chemical added food.
Error: factos Suggestion: factor
---------------
argument 1 -- OK
argument 2 -- not OK. Look:
This rise in the commercial use of salicylates has been found to correlate with a steady decline...
better to argue like:
maybe other reasons caused the decline.
argument 3 -- not exactly.
----------------
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 5 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 367 350
No. of Characters: 1896 1500
No. of Different Words: 161 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.377 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.166 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.753 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 153 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 112 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 74 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 58 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.35 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.664 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.5 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.329 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.523 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.06 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 98, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this food' or 'these foods'?
Suggestion: this food; these foods
... totally because of eating food made by these food processing comapnies which are used to ...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 324, Rule ID: ALSO_SENT_END[1]
Message: 'Also' is not used at the end of the sentence. Use 'as well' instead.
Suggestion: as well
... in consumption might be another reason also. The author should have mention more st...
^^^^
Line 7, column 68, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'improved'.
Suggestion: improved
... that studied which was founded is also improve to decline headaches because now it is ...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 405, Rule ID: MORE_A_JJ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'a more aboveboard'?
Suggestion: a more aboveboard
... relation of both. The author should be more an aboveboard for his statment. In conclusion, thi...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, finally, first, firstly, however, if, so, then, in addition, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 23.0 19.6327345309 117% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 12.9520958084 69% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 11.1786427146 63% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 13.6137724551 88% => OK
Pronoun: 29.0 28.8173652695 101% => OK
Preposition: 47.0 55.5748502994 85% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 16.3942115768 98% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1941.0 2260.96107784 86% => OK
No of words: 367.0 441.139720559 83% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.28882833787 5.12650576532 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.37689890912 4.56307096286 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.79836910235 2.78398813304 101% => OK
Unique words: 165.0 204.123752495 81% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.449591280654 0.468620217663 96% => OK
syllable_count: 627.3 705.55239521 89% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 4.96107784431 202% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 19.7664670659 101% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 22.8473053892 79% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 66.3433493276 57.8364921388 115% => OK
Chars per sentence: 97.05 119.503703932 81% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.35 23.324526521 79% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.75 5.70786347227 83% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 8.20758483034 61% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.67664670659 214% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.366366922769 0.218282227539 168% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.117046823729 0.0743258471296 157% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.112955132424 0.0701772020484 161% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.236102375391 0.128457276422 184% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.142520920908 0.0628817314937 227% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.7 14.3799401198 88% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 44.75 48.3550499002 93% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 12.197005988 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.4 12.5979740519 106% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.97 8.32208582834 96% => OK
difficult_words: 80.0 98.500998004 81% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 12.3882235529 57% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 9.2 11.1389221557 83% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.