The following appeared in a recommendation from the president of Amburg's Chamber of Commerce.
"Last October the city of Belleville installed high-intensity lighting in its central business district, and vandalism there declined within a month. The city of Amburg has recently begun police patrols on bicycles in its business district, but the rate of vandalism there remains constant. We should install high-intensity lighting throughout Amburg, then, because doing so is a more effective way to combat crime. By reducing crime in this way, we can revitalize the declining neighborhoods in our city."
The argument asserts that the installment of high-intensity lighting will reduce the crime rates in the city of Amburg. However, the assertion has several unsubstantiated assumption and is therefore unpersuasive as it stands.
First, the President of the Amburg Chamber of Commerce shows the case of the city of Belleville's installment on high-intensity lighting, which resulted a decline of vandalism. This case however, cannot be persuasive without further explamation. The installation of this lighting might be just a supplementary enhancement on certain system like CCTV or increasing time on patrols. Moreover, the city of Belleville might have the most vandalism rate in its central business district only.
Second, the President assumes that the police patrols on bicycles are no use since the vandalism rate remains constant. However, this assumption cannot be persuasive without other statistics on the city of Amburg. There might be a possibility that even though the rate of vandalism remains the same, the rate of arresting them might increase. Moreover, there might be other positive outcomes like the low rate of damage caused by vandalism. Just simply showing one statistic and assuming one situation might be a hasty decision.
Third, the President assumes that the high-intensity lighting will prevent the rate of vandalism in the city of Amburg. This assumption however, needs more evidence to be persuasive. The other aspects about preventing the vandalism, must be at the same level between these two cities to make this statement true. Maybe the city of Amburg have more residents than the city of Belleville. Maybe the observation rate of the vandalism is higher in the city of Amburg. We cannot be sure that the case of Belleville will make same result in Amburg.
In conclusion, the President's argument about the installment of high-intensity lighting will significantly reduce crime rates in Amburg fails to provide enough evidence to uphold its assertion. Since the argument does not have enough data, it lacks logical explamation and therefore unpersuasive.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
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| 2023-08-18 | sam 27 | 66 | view |
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| 2023-02-15 | tedyang777 | 70 | view |
| 2022-11-05 | predatoros | 70 | view |
| 2021-08-07 | souptikc80 | 64 | view |
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 5 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 326 350
No. of Characters: 1725 1500
No. of Different Words: 151 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.249 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.291 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.954 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 128 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 101 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 76 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 53 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.158 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 4.955 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.579 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.361 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.361 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.094 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 1 5
Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, however, if, may, moreover, second, therefore, third, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 19.6327345309 61% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.9520958084 108% => OK
Conjunction : 4.0 11.1786427146 36% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 6.0 13.6137724551 44% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 17.0 28.8173652695 59% => OK
Preposition: 48.0 55.5748502994 86% => OK
Nominalization: 20.0 16.3942115768 122% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1764.0 2260.96107784 78% => OK
No of words: 326.0 441.139720559 74% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.41104294479 5.12650576532 106% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.24917287072 4.56307096286 93% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.02509981253 2.78398813304 109% => OK
Unique words: 155.0 204.123752495 76% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.475460122699 0.468620217663 101% => OK
syllable_count: 565.2 705.55239521 80% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 10.0 8.76447105788 114% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 19.7664670659 96% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 22.8473053892 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 33.4731876825 57.8364921388 58% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 92.8421052632 119.503703932 78% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.1578947368 23.324526521 74% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.89473684211 5.70786347227 68% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.25449101796 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 8.20758483034 61% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.67664670659 192% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.289305959875 0.218282227539 133% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.105230631985 0.0743258471296 142% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.111260226918 0.0701772020484 159% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.182081550823 0.128457276422 142% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0922483387364 0.0628817314937 147% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.6 14.3799401198 88% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 45.76 48.3550499002 95% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 12.197005988 91% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.8 12.5979740519 110% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.35 8.32208582834 100% => OK
difficult_words: 80.0 98.500998004 81% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 12.3882235529 73% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 11.1389221557 79% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.