Claim Young people s tendency to make extensive use of portable devices like smartphones and tablets has hurt their development of social skills Reason These devices encourage users to form artificial personalities and relationships online rather than ful

Essay topics:

Claim: Young people's tendency to make extensive use of portable devices like smartphones and tablets has hurt their development of social skills.

Reason: These devices encourage users to form artificial personalities and relationships online rather than fully and honestly engaging with the people around them.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim and the reason on which that claim is based.

I mostly disagree with this claim. As this claim takes a very limited view of what should be counted as social skills: according to this claim, social skills are limited to only skills for face-to-face communication, whereas in the digital age, the social skills for communication via social media are as important. Due to this overly narrow definition adopted by this claim, the reason behind the claim is in itself questionable: while it is true that users tend to contruct personas for online activities that are different than their real-life personalities, this is by no means dishonesty, but a common social skill that is used in online and face-to-face communications alike. To elaborate, one constructs different personalities for every different contexts of communivcation, no matter it is online or in-person contexts, because different contexts have different codes of conduct. Take a college student as an example. The college student may appears to be chill and a bit flippant when he is among his peers because he needs to fit into his peers, while he is diligent and serious when talking to professors because he needs to leave a good impressions on professors: these are also different personalities based on the needs and customs of different contexts. The same rule also applies to online communication: the need for communication on the Internet is to capture attention, which entails personas that are eye-catching, typical, and usually including some extent of exaggeration. And just as a serious personality serves the purpose of impressing professors, a eye-catching and exaggerating persona also makes communication more effective onlines: the more attention one can captures online, the efficiently and widely that one’s idea can be spread and received on the Internet. To be specific, if the college student successfully builds an eye-catching persona online that grants him more followers on Instagram, whe he voices out his idea of promoting the rights of trans people, he ideas will be able to reach and influence more people. Therefore, the act of persona-building is not unique to online communication, and is a neccesary social skill.

Based on this broader definition of social skills, what should be considered is whether the development of online socializing skills hamper the growths in face-to-face communication skills. My answere is negative: the persona that one adoptes online will little affect one’s face-to-face social abilities as one can switch modes of communication based on different occasions. According to research by psychologists and applied linguistics, human beings are very sensitive to the contexts of communication and can swiftly swictch their modes of behavior and expressions to meet the needs of different communication contexts. That is to say, just as one can switch from a casual mode of conversations with one’s friends to a formal mode of communication with teachers, one can just as swiftly switch to the face-to-face communication mode as long as they turn of their mobile devices. Admittedly, if someone spends too much time on social media and almost no time on talking to people in-person, they may have problems communicating with people in face-to-face. Nevertheless, in this case, what hinders one’s development of social skills is the lack of practice in the mode of face-to-face communication, not the act of online communication itself: if one shuts oneself in his or her room, talking no no one online nor in-person, he or she will also gradually lose social skills.

To conclude, unless one spends so much time online that he or she has no time for face-to-face communication, portable devices are unlikely to hamper the growths of social skills.

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Average: 6.6 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 527, Rule ID: RATHER_THEN[2]
Message: Did you mean 'different 'from''? 'Different than' is often considered colloquial style.
Suggestion: from
...or online activities that are different than their real-life personalities, this is ...
^^^^
Line 1, column 1151, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[2]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'impression'?
Suggestion: impression
...essors because he needs to leave a good impressions on professors: these are also different...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 1576, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...s the purpose of impressing professors, a eye-catching and exaggerating persona a...
^
Line 1, column 1692, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[2]
Message: The verb 'can' requires the base form of the verb: 'capture'
Suggestion: capture
...ive onlines: the more attention one can captures online, the efficiently and widely that...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 1297, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: no
...uts oneself in his or her room, talking no no one online nor in-person, he or she wil...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 1297, Rule ID: NOW[2]
Message: Did you mean 'now' (=at this moment) instead of 'no' (negation)?
Suggestion: now
...uts oneself in his or her room, talking no no one online nor in-person, he or she ...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, if, may, nevertheless, so, therefore, whereas, while, as for, it is true, that is to say

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 27.0 19.5258426966 138% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.4196629213 113% => OK
Conjunction : 21.0 14.8657303371 141% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.3162921348 106% => OK
Pronoun: 46.0 33.0505617978 139% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 86.0 58.6224719101 147% => OK
Nominalization: 24.0 12.9106741573 186% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3147.0 2235.4752809 141% => OK
No of words: 594.0 442.535393258 134% => OK
Chars per words: 5.29797979798 5.05705443957 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.93681225224 4.55969084622 108% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.20954948967 2.79657885939 115% => OK
Unique words: 268.0 215.323595506 124% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.451178451178 0.4932671777 91% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 1005.3 704.065955056 143% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59117977528 107% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 6.24550561798 112% => OK
Article: 7.0 4.99550561798 140% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.10617977528 193% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.77640449438 225% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 5.0 4.38483146067 114% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.2370786517 84% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 34.0 23.0359550562 148% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 92.5705192708 60.3974514979 153% => OK
Chars per sentence: 185.117647059 118.986275619 156% => OK
Words per sentence: 34.9411764706 23.4991977007 149% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.82352941176 5.21951772744 112% => OK
Paragraphs: 3.0 4.97078651685 60% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 6.0 7.80617977528 77% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 10.2758426966 49% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 5.13820224719 156% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.83258426966 83% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.14724014574 0.243740707755 60% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0565312194567 0.0831039109588 68% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0437566673002 0.0758088955206 58% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.105189296412 0.150359130593 70% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0212015626859 0.0667264976115 32% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 21.0 14.1392134831 149% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 28.51 48.8420337079 58% => Flesch_reading_ease is low.
smog_index: 13.0 7.92365168539 164% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 17.7 12.1743820225 145% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.05 12.1639044944 116% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.02 8.38706741573 108% => OK
difficult_words: 139.0 100.480337079 138% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 19.5 11.8971910112 164% => OK
gunning_fog: 15.6 11.2143820225 139% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.7820224719 110% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Minimum four paragraphs wanted.

Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.